Wednesday, January 29, 2014

I Do More By 6:35 Than Most People Do By Ever

5:55  The alarm goes off.  I head downstairs to get things ready for breakfast while COW gets the kids up.

5:57  While looking down at the counter, a think I see a shadow go across.  I look up, see nothing, go on with what I was doing.

6:01  Star comes downstairs and says, "There's a bat flying around in our room," then sits down to eat some cereal like nothing happened.

6:02  COW comes downstairs with Turken and asks if we want to take care of it now or later.  I answer "NOW!" because that was a dumb question.  When else would we take care of it??  I think he meant he wanted me to take care of it after he left the house.

6:03  COW gets the (what normal people use to catch butterflies) net, handed it to me, and went to take a shower.

6:04  Net in hand, I tentatively opened their door a crack.  Nothing.  No bat flying around.  I searched the room to no avail.

6:07  I gave up the search and headed downstairs to move breakfast along.

6:08  Turken is sitting at the counter crying, because no one will put milk in his cereal.  When I shoot a questioning glance at the big kids, Phoenix responds, "Mostly because we don't understand what a whiney ahwahahejahehalsd means."  Touche.

6:09  Giant breaks in with, "It's like I woke up in a cops movie.  Dad woke us up and told us to stay down.  We were to stop, drop, and roll our way to the door, because the bat was flying so low.  It was so low, I had to wait for it to fly to the other side of the room before I could crouch down and get around Star's bed."

6:11  Buttercup enters the kitchen and says, "I had to use the upstairs bathroom, because the downstairs one is clogged."

6:13  Giant says, "I wish today was Dress Like Your Parents Day.  I'd go in carrying a net and a plunger."

6:15-6:20  The boys get dressed for school in their room without batting an eye.

6:20  I drove Phoenix to meet his carpool.

6:26  I return home to find the rest of the family at the door waiting to leave.

6:35  I head upstairs to find the boys' room door and my bedroom door closed.  Apparently, COW closed the boys' door to make sure the bat didn't go out, then closed ours just in case it did.  I looked in the boys' room again, but still no bat.

As I write this, we have at least one bat in the house.  Could be two, since whatever caused that shadow over the counter wouldn't have had time to make it upstairs before the upstairs bat was discovered.

I have no idea where it/they are.

I have two thoughts about the bat situation:

1.  What does it say about us that not one person even flinched about a bat loose in the house?

2.  I do not want anyone in my family to be this guy:


How has your day started?

Regardless, I hope you have a lovely day!

UPDATE:

8:48pm  Still no sight of the bat.  The boys and I searched their room.  We stripped their beds, looked behind every curtain and piece of furniture, inside every closet.  No bat.

9:02  I left them with a kiss and a "let me know if it shows up".

10:14  Sitting at my computer downstairs, COW sick in bed, I hear a bang and someone running down the stairs.  Phoenix says, "It's back."

10:15  Wielding my butterfly net, I turn on the light in the boys' room and see it circling around.  Star stays in bed, hiding under his blanket.  Giant never wakes up.  I watch it swoop for a bit to figure out it's pattern, then swing.  Caught it in one swish of the net.  I grabbed a notebook which just happened to be near me, trapped the bat in the net, and took it outside.  It flew away, making for one happy bat and a house full of happy people.

31 comments:

  1. Ummm I haven't been quite as productive...apparently I need to step it up a bit. And while we don't have a bat in the house, we do have coyotes skulking about in the woods right behind us.

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    1. What I could have said, but didn't, was that AFTER 635, the productivity drops drastically. :)

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  2. Definitely not as hectic here although I was dressed with lunch packed when I learned school was cancelled AGAIN...day #5!

    The one bat incident I recall occurred soon after we were married while visiting friends of ours. The men donned laundry basket protective head/upper body gear and tennis racquet weapons. What a sight!

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    1. You are still having school cancellations?? Wow! What a difference just a couple hours south makes! My kids haven't had a day off for over a week now. Although, the public schools have, thanks to the cold. We don't have buses, so there isn't nearly the danger for the kids.

      Hahaha!! That image is hilarious. And completely something my husband would do in order to catch a bat.

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  3. It/they are probably hanging in some dark closet. Once it gets dark outside, turn on EVERY light in the house and open the doors. They'll want to get away from the light and go where it's dark. My parents had bats in the house once ,,,, or twice,,,,and this is what worked. Beats a bat bite in your sleep!!!
    Signed, Miss Bloggypants sister, Jodi :)

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    1. Thank you for the info, Kari's sister! :)
      No bat showed up this evening. We had the lights on (didn't open the doors, though. With the zero temps, we wanted to see him before we did that step.) but he never came out of hiding. We searched the boys' room, but couldn't find him. I'm a bit nervous to go to bed now.

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  4. When I was working I had busy days from the start to the end. Now not so much. Lots of leisure time since my kids are grown and we are retired. It's fabulous. You'll see.

    Yikes on the bats.

    Have a fabulous day. ☺

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    1. It's quite weird, to want the kids to stay small forever, yet at the same time be looking forward to retirement. Weird, but I"m doing it anyway.

      Double yikes that we still haven't found it.

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  5. Lol! Yay you. Yeah, about leaving the doors and windows open...it does work, you just might want to bundle up a smidge. Lol! I'm dying here! We're in the middle of polar hell and you have to vent a bat. I needed this laugh. Thank you!
    If it makes you feel any better, we have a mouse. I begged my husband to catch it while I was in Pennsylvania. But apparently, it's smarter than the sticky trap. So really, our days are pretty much the same, right down to the whiney ahwahahejahehalsd and teenager wisecracks. Yep. Sadly the same. :)

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    1. I'm glad you could get a laugh out of the situation. And I have to say, you are the last person I would expect to say "polar hell". The fact that you did makes me like you even more. :)

      We have come across our own brilliant mice. I hate them. Does it make you feel any better to know we had a mouse in my van? :)

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  6. HEY EVERYBODY... ^^That's my SISTER!!^^ ;)

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    1. Jodi, that is. (I forgot to hit "publish", so finally when I did more people commented and now my ^^arrows^^ aren't pointing at my sister. ... I'm a doofus.)

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  7. Now I'm going to be creeped out the rest of the day about that bat. And I'm still sleeping for most of your routine.

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    1. I just caught it, so you can stop being creeped out now! :)

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  8. 6:13 Giant says, "I wish today was Dress Like Your Parents Day. I'd go in carrying a net and a plunger."

    That's just cracked me up! After just having a phone conversation with a terminally ill camping friend I needed a laugh - thanks!

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    1. Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about your camping friend.
      I'm glad I could provide a laugh and a distraction.

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  9. Rabid bats are probably also incredibly rare. And if it was rabid it would've gone for you by now. Your bat is probably normal.

    Time to fit a moth with GPS and let it loose as bait...

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    1. They are rare. I'm not too worried, but there's always that little bit of "Yikes!"

      No need to find a moth. The bat has been caught and released a matter of minutes ago.

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    2. Well done, WonderWoman :D I knew the bat wouldn't have you evaded for too long :)

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  10. OMG, 6:13 had me laughing. He'd almost look like a Dalek, too, if he's wore an old-fashioned metal trash can over his head :-) Hope you find the little bats, soon! And I know I'm lazy, barely getting myself ready for work in the same amount of time!

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    1. Now that I know what a Dalek is (I really need to watch Dr. Who. More and more people I know are gaga over it.) that's funny!
      The bat has just been caught and released. Happy day!
      Oh, you're not lazy. I didn't mention that as soon as the kids leave at 6:35, my productivity drops considerably. :)

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  11. Yikes! I hope you find the bat. That'd give me the heebie jeebies. My morning was lame. I didn't go to skate practice because I was going to a play group. Well, the host decided to cancel the play group at the last minute "because it's foggy". No I'm not making this up. Needless to say, I was miffed because I skipped skating practice, which I love, to meet other moms, and I was annoyed that the play date was cancelled at the last minute because of a "fog". Pffft.

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    1. Found! Sure, it was 16 hours later and while the boys were already in bed, but it has been found!

      Cancelled because of fog?!?!?! She wasn't even going to have to drive in it??? That is bizarre. Had you been to this play group before? Those play groups can be difficult. It's good to get out and meet other moms, but sometimes they just aren't the right moms.

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  12. When you're waking up.....I'm at work. But I'm not complaining, I love night shift!
    Bats are fine outside. Notsomuch inside. Maybe it turned into Batman......

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    1. I don't think I'd be a happy night shift worker. I know several moms who work 2 night shifts each week, and it works out very well for their families.

      I am perfectly fine with bats in their natural habitat. Not so in my house.

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  13. Oh my gosh, this is amazing - First, I would love to say that I'm awake at 5:55, but I'm not. My body refuses to move before there is a 6 on the display. Sadly, this means I have far too little time to get my butt and Kidzilla's in gear. We are not morning people here. I'm usually jumping out of bed at 6:35 screaming something like "oh sh*t I'm going to be freaking late!" I really have to get more sleep.

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  14. I cracked up when COW handed YOU the net and went off to shower. Hahaha!

    You are one Bat Ninja Warrior!!! I would've been under the blankets like Star...only for the entire day. ;)

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  15. Of course COW handed you the net and took a shower. You are Super Mom warrior of bats, sickness and the ER. Just as an FYI. My cousin lives in a barn that they turned into a house. Anyway they get bats all the time they also have ceiling fans. What is worse than waking up to a bat flying around your house? Finding one that is decapitated on your kitchen table when you come down for breakfast.

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  16. Funny! And I thought mornings were chaotic at my house! Is there anything you CANNOT do? No way would I chase a bat around (a mouse yes, a bat no - all the ugly critters get passed on to my husband).

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  17. I love your house! I wish we were neighbors. If it makes you feel any better, I'm not sure anyone in my house would flinch either. And I laughed so hard at which ever one of your kids who wants to go to school with a net and a plunger! So funny! Our toilets are constantly clogged too. Right now I'm pretty sure the 2 year old is the culprit. I think that kid uses a whole roll every time he goes to the bathroom despite my pleas that Mommy be the only one to wipe his tush.

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Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you're thinking!