Friday, January 17, 2014

What Do the Contents of Your Bathroom Cabinet Say about You?

Let's play a game.

A stranger has to put a bio together about you, but the only clues he has to work with are the contents of your bathroom cabinet.  What would he have to say about you?

According to my bathroom cabinet, I am a new mother with lots of facial hair.  I am a vain woman, concerned about the appearance of my curly hair and the color of my lips.  I have ridiculously dry skin and eat lots of salad and broccoli. I hate to wear shoes, and choose to go barefoot as often as possible.  I travel.  A lot.  I am concerned about running out of soap, but not toilet paper.  I get bad cramps.

I can explain the 2 curling irons, a straightener, hair dryer, and 8 bottles/cans of hair product.  I have crazy curly hair and a penchant for getting mullets.

I can explain the 28 itty bitty bottles of shampoo and conditioner and 11 itty bitty bars of soap.  COW is stingy, making sure to abscond with the items every time he stays in a hotel, yet not stingy enough to actually use the items he insists on taking once we are home.

I can explain the 10 toothbrushes and 15 dental floss samples.  I always keep toothbrushes on hand for kids who spontaneously spend the night, and all 8 of us have recently been to the dentist.  Our dentist gives out lots of samples, and we keep them to take with us on trips.

I can explain the many bottles of lotion and foot products.  I'm a teacher.  Lotion is a common gift for teachers, (My candles are kept somewhere else.) but I have only one brand of lotion that works for me.  The gifts never get used.

I can explain the lipsticks and lip glosses.  Ok, some of them.  Some of them looked good when I saw them at the store, but not on my lips once I got home.  I can't explain the empty lip gloss containers.

I certainly can't explain the nursing pads and 2 squirt bottles for postpartum "cleansing".  And on a related note, how long is a woman considered "postpartum"?  Four years?

There is a rice bag thing that someone once made for me (mumble mumble years ago) that has never been used.

There is a home-wax kit (for all those annoying chin hairs that have started popping up) that I've purchased but haven't used.  There isn't a microwave in my bathroom and there's no privacy downstairs. Imagine the questions I'd have to dodge from Cuckoo and Turken if they saw me screaming and crying in pain after putting wax from the microwave on my face, then violently ripping it off.

There are nine bars of soap, because I buy in bulk.  They will last forever, because some of my kids seem to forget to actually wash with soap.

I wish I could say my dresser would be a better place to look for clues about me.  Alas, it's not.  According to my sock drawer, I work in an office which requires hose.  Blue is my suit color of choice, going by the number of pairs of blue hose I have.

Last night COW asked if I was pregnant.  Red flags were going off, thinking I was nesting, since each day he has come home from work to find a themed bag of trash waiting to go out.

No, Dear.  I'm not nesting.  I'm just tired of being surrounded by clutter and stuff we no longer need.

Each day, I choose one thing to conquer.  The first thing I did was clean off my dresser.  It had become the "Place to Drop All Things I Don't Feel Like Putting Away Right Now" as well as the "Leave Mom a Funny Note in the Dust" spot.  No more!  It is clean and shiny and tidy.

My wallet was next.  Eight appointment reminder cards were in there, all having to do with someone's teeth.  So was a paper with the phone numbers COW was to call when I went into the hospital to give birth to Cuckoo.  Two expired insurance cards and 15 expired coupons from Dick's Sporting Goods were removed.  Oh, and 1 Borders card, since Borders closed about 3 years ago.

Today, I'm thinking I will conquer the linen closet.  And then put a lock on it, so kids can't get in and mess it up.

Little bits of time conquering little areas of clutter.

Thank you, LIsa, for the idea.  It's working like a charm.

Do you have hidden (or not-so-hidden) spots of clutter that could use a cleaning out?  What might someone find there, and what is your story of how it got there?

Have a lovely day!


  1. My whole house if filled with clutter of one sort or another. I may have to try choosing one thing to tackle each day and start getting rid of some of it because it's starting to make me crazy.

    1. Do it!! It makes me so happy to see the bits of organization and clutter-free areas. I'm actually less tense, and I didn't even know I was tense before! Do it!!

  2. Mine says I'm old. Bwahahahahahahaha.

    Have a fabulous day and weekend. ☺

    1. Hahahaha!!! Do I know you well enough to make the joke, "So your bathroom speaks the truth?" If not, completely ignore the fact that I said it. :)

  3. WHOOT! This is HILARIOUS. I'm doing a cleaning swap TONIGHT. My friend's coming over and we're gonna clean my flat and have dinner together, then tomorrow I go to her house and we clean there.

    I love what your stuff says about you. Mine pretty much says I'm a slob and I read too much.

    1. I'm glad you found it amusing. :)
      I read about your cleaning swap, and I love it. How relaxed and happy do you feel to be sitting in a clean apartment?

  4. It feels good to conquer the mess... we just did the upstairs bedrooms we need to do the basement, a desk in our living room, the coat closet too, oh while I'm at it the kitchen too! Have a great weekend!

    1. It certainly does. Our bedrooms always seem to be the worst. No need to worry about people showing up at the house and seeing them, so they are lower on the priorities. Good for you, tackling yours!
      It seems once I start decluttering one area, I am much more motivated to tackle others. Keep it up!

  5. Ok, I need to clean out our linnen closet.. And the bathroom cabinet.. And the undersink cabinet in the kitchen.. And my closet.. ARRRRRRGGG.. I think I'll opt for procrastinating and purge before we move.. Kudos to you for organizing, Christine!

    1. I have opted for procrastinating for way too long. Years, in fact. It's past time. You go right ahead and procrastinate as long as you want. :)

  6. Awww and WOOT! So glad it is working for you, Christine! You're welcome. I am really pleased with the progress here. And once I get something clean, well, then I want more clean. And I am really concentrating on keeping the clean areas that way and not re-cluttering.

    Meanwhile, Lizzi is right - this is hysterical! And oh so familiar...we also have a "place to drop all things I don't feel like putting away right now." And let me tell you how big THAT pile is! The old appointment cards and such in the wallet? Had to laugh because I'm pretty sure I still have our old address on my information/emergency contact card. That's pretty bad.

    Your bathroom definitely says more exciting things about you than mine says about me. I think the most I get is "here lives a woman who has really itchy skin and fears running out of hair clips and ponytail holders even though she wears the same clip and ponytail holder every time she uses one. The end."

    1. That is the key, isn't it? Once it's clean and organized, we need to keep it that way!

      I'm glad you found it amusing. :) We seem to have a PILE in each and every room of things I don't feel like putting away. They are disappearing quickly, though. You have gotten me pumped for this decluttering!

      Hahaha about the clips and ponytail holders. I had a variety of those, plus bobby pins, hanging out in the back of the cabinet, too.

  7. My house is in need of major de-cluttering. I was just thinking that the other day. We'd have a whole lot more space and my meltdowns on clutter would be non-existent if I'd just conquer one thing at a time. That's what I need to do! :) I am so glad though, that I'm not the only one who feels like that sometimes! Way to Go! :)

    1. Do it! I am astounded at how much more relaxed I am after only 15 minutes each day. It works so well! You are not, by any means, the only one who feels this way.

  8. Oh jeez. All of my spots need a cleaning out and each says something different about me (also I lovelove that Cow asked if you were preggers because one of my first thoughts was "I haven't organized like that since I was pregnant or when Tucker was a newborn and actually slept more hours than he was awake).
    Um. Office: I'm a slob and very unorganized and should really catch up on the last year of scrapbook
    MY dresser: I'm a slob and have a bunch of really nice jewelry so I must use it and look festive at all times (I never use it)
    My bathroom cabinet: I love lotion and tampons and really old crumbly soap
    My closet: I must have a corporate job because SO MANY SUITS. Oh wait, except they're dusty...and too small. Huh. Also, I'm a slob.
    My kitchen: I have a kid who has way too many toys
    My wallet: I am organized and efficient, except well, there are credit cards that haven't been used in five years and have expired in there, so maybe I just have good credit?

    This is hilarious and awesome, Christine, and WTH is a cleaning swap???

    I did take down our Christmas lights outside yesterday, and put away the Christmas wrapping paper that was on the office/guest room bed, so that's big points right?? Oh and I gave three boxes of too-small kid clothing away...
    Still. I am so with you on the need for this. In fact, one of my "resolutions" (in quotes because I'm a slob and don't really do them) is to spend 20 minutes a week de-cluttering just one tiny area. So far, this year, I'm okay... mostly.

  9. Okay, I've read like three of your posts because I'm SO behind in the blogosphere I might never, ever, never, ever catch up!! First, congrats on 500 posts! Wow. Just wow. I don't even think I'm at 50. That's amazing.

    I loved this one in particular because I've been cleaning out drawers, closets, and cabinets throughout the holidays, and coincidently I went into a drawer in the bathroom to get new toothbrushes for the kids and realized, holy shit, I need to clean these bathroom drawers out! Fast forward two hours and I'm reading this post - LOL. I think the main thing a person would learn about from my bathroom cabinets/drawers is that I dress up for Halloween. A lot. I found tons of colored hair gel, vampire blood, scar tattoos, and face make up! WTH? I mean a TON. Also, I have a lot of eye shadow for a person who doesn't wear make up. Why? Why nine dealies of shadow? I don't remember the last time I wore it. No joke. Also, what are all those weird bra strap things? They must be for "convertible" bras I'd purchased that could turn into a strapless, or cross back, or whatever, and I've ended up with all these strappy things. I'm sure I no longer even have the bras that go to them. Other than random odds and ends, there's really not much. A pair of tweezers...of course. Blush. Mascara. Deodorant. Q-tips. Advil. Lots of advil.
    Pretty boring, really.

  10. One would think I do nothing but bru dh my teeth and the TMI catagory...I haven't had to shsve since chemo ten yrs ago and a guy hasnt lived here in five...snd he hwd a beard...wait here a minute while I go toss those razors.

  11. Bwahahahaha! You make me smile! The only reason I don't have postpartum items under my sink is because we moved a year ago. Otherwise, I would be right there with you! And I hear you on the soap. I think my kids forget to use it too. And yes, buying in bulk is necessary when you have 1 million people in your family.

  12. Sorting/cleaning one area a day is such a great idea. It's much easier to do that than trying to clean the house in a day. As I go through things, I put stuff for the thrift shop in a grocery bag. Over the course of about a month, I fill a bag. Off to the thrift shop it goes, and I pull out another bag. It's an ongoing process that helps me keep the clutter down. :-)


Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you're thinking!