I took a full dose of Nyquil.
That was dumb.
My head was foggy the next morning.
And I was off kilter on into the afternoon.
The couch was my friend.
I stayed on my friend.
All morning and on into the afternoon.
The children came to see me.
They asked for food and drink.
I granted permission.
They fed themselves.
The animals needed food and drink.
They did not come to see me.
I just knew.
I sent the children out.
One child returned to see me.
I rose from the couch.
I donned a winter coat and thick work gloves.
Two children were called in to assist.
I took stock of the situation.
A dead chicken peered at me.
From a crack under the door.
Just as the child had reported.
I went through an alternate door.
Two children were given instructions.
One child whined.
I ignored her.
I went into the coop.
One child corralled the live chickens.
I grabbed the dead chicken's leg.
A child opened the door from the outside.
Where the head was.
I pulled the chicken out.
I trudged through the snow.
Carrying a dead chicken.
The chicken was tossed over a fence.
It landed in the field.
I went back to the house.
The boots, coat, and gloves were removed.
My hands were washed.
I collapsed on my friend.
I stayed there.
All afternoon and into the night.
COW brought pizza home for dinner.
I extracted a promise from COW.
To never take
a full dose
I'm feeling much better.
The chicken is not.
Have a lovely day!
Oh, I do hope your cold goes away soon.ReplyDelete
My daughter's pet rat died a similar death this week--it somehow managed to get its head through the bars of the cage. Fortunately, I wasn't fighting a cold while I tried to console my poor daughter. I'm sorry you had to deal with death (and a screaming daughter) while under the weather. Ah, the joys of motherhood!
It has. Thanks!Delete
Oh, it was a bad week for animals. I'm sorry for your daughter. I have a friend who has a pet rat, and she would be devastated if he died that way.
I'm sure my daughter wasn't as bad as I make it. On drugs and sick, it seemed like she was screaming, but I'm sure healthy people wouldn't have thought so.
''A dead chicken peered at me" - that must be one of the funniest sentences I've ever read. Or maybe I've just got a weird sense of humour?!ReplyDelete
Seriously though, dead creatures aren't really funny at the time (I've dealt with my own fair share over the years) especially if you're not feeling well. I hope you get rid of your cold soon and start to feel better.
I am just glad you have a sense of humor! And that you got a laugh out of something I wrote.Delete
No, dead creatures are never fun. Rarely are they funny. Although, I have to say, I did laugh when the opossum died by chicken feed.
I feel much better, thank you.
Oh dear oh dear. And if you follow it back, it's all the fault of that book for keeping you up so you ended up with the cold in the first place. Didn't I say books can be dangerous. Fatal for the chicken, in fact....ReplyDelete
While I agree that books can be dangerous, I'm thinking it didn't have anything to do with the chicken. That stupid bird would have done that to itself whether I was sick or not.Delete
one word: 'Post Envy'ReplyDelete
(for (y)our less clark-imbued Readers: this is such a cool post, everything about it, wish I wrote it.)
Hey!! if you're still sick (today), then you'll probably want to hid in bed (as early as feasible), we know you have a laptop (we saw it the last time you joined us) then you can join us tonight on the vid chat ('cause as we all know, nothin funnier than a sick-distracted scott!)
plenty of fluids and sleep (well, one out of two will have to do, huh?)
Since you were so complimentary, I won't point out that Post Envy is two words. :)Delete
I'm glad you liked the post.
I'm feeling much better.
Yeah I can't take Nyquil anymore really at all...even half dose. I have to know that I can be completely unproductive the next day and even then I don't like how I feel.ReplyDelete
Sorry about your chicken...
It had been so long since I've taken it, I had forgotten how awful I felt when I did. I can't get over how long my head was messed up.Delete
Thanks. I still have eggs. 15 dozen in my fridge at last count. Let me know when you need some. I better never run into you at Meijer with eggs in your basket. :)
Nyquil cures one thing...consciousness! This sounds like a real no fun to be had situation but the post was brilliant! I am glad to hear that you are feeling better.ReplyDelete
No joke! That stuff knocks you out!Delete
I'm glad you liked the post.
I think my body was scared I would take more Nyquil and healed itself right up.
Bwahahahahahahahaaha. Not that you are sick with a cold and overdosed on Nyquil, but that the kids said what they said and how they said it. Way too funny.ReplyDelete
Have a terrific day and weekend. Feel better soon and no more Nyquil. ☺
I love it when a post makes people Bwahahahahaha. :)Delete
No more Nyquil. Ever.
Oh no! Hope you're feeling better. Being numb to the world on Nyquil might have been a good way to be when handling a dead chicken though,ReplyDelete
Really, you are right. It was pretty cut and dry and unemotional when my brain was fuzzy like that.Delete
I am almost back to my old self, thanks!
Your posts always make me laugh!! I'm sorry you were feeling so crappy. Even sorrier you had to deal with a dead chicken. But this post.....definitely makes your top 3!ReplyDelete
I have never taken NyQuil. I may have to try it sometime. ;)
I'm glad! I want you to keep coming back.Delete
Top 3!?!?! Perhaps I should take Nyquil more often instead of never! :)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Omg.. I'm not laughing at your illness but I am laughing at that whole scenario! Anyone who has children - and in my case, chickens too! - Is laughing hysterically at this and feeling your pain! Omg, this makes me laugh.. I hope you're feeling better and yes, please step away from the Nyquil cup.. :) New follower too btw.ReplyDelete
I am so glad you got a good laugh out of this. I do love it when people laugh.Delete
I am feeling much better, thank you. The Nyquil is safely in the cupboard to stay.
Yay! I'm looking forward to getting to know you!
This comment has been removed by the author.ReplyDelete
Yow! Poor chicken and you......oh dear. Hope you're feeling better, Christine, do get some rest!ReplyDelete
Poor chicken. It had to have been a rough death.Delete
I am feeling much better. Thanks to the snow, I got plenty of rest.
Why didn't you eat the chicken, btw?ReplyDelete
Because we don't know how long it was dead. We only eat our chickens if we are the ones who do the killing. Blood can taint the meat if you don't bleed them out right away.Delete
And here I thought for a second you'd have roast chicken and root beggies for dinner (had the idea before I read Lizzi's comment).. Am I gross??? Oh, and don't take a full dose of Nyquil again!!ReplyDelete
Not gross. Sensible, I'd say.Delete
We await your reply with bated breath, Christine...
Not with this chicken. Only the ones we kill ourselves.Delete
well I hope you feel better soon Christine. And strangely enough before I read this I decided to send you a little video in which your name came up this evening. Hopefully my phone can stand sending it itss just a weak little phone. It might have taken a whole dose of nyquil for all I know.ReplyDelete
I'm feeling much better! I just saw the alert in my email, so I will be off to see the video.Delete
Oh no!!! Poor you. Nyquil is like anesthesia for me. I can only take it if David is home in case one of the girls or the dog needs something. Like a new limb or something important.ReplyDelete
Dead chicken? I would have stayed on your friend
Ha! I thought everything kids need is important. :)Delete
I would have liked to, believe me. It would have been much worse, though, if I left it. Who knows what those other chickens would have done to it.
I love NyQuil, When I want to be conked out, that's my drug of choice. I think it's 50% alcohol. I don't have any chickens though, so I'm probably safe.ReplyDelete
Oh, it will conk you out alright! They should put a warning on the label. "This product is not recommended for people with chickens."Delete
Ha, ha ha! "The chicken is not." Sorry but that was funny. Nyquil knocks me for a loop, too.ReplyDelete
I hope there are no more casualties in the near future!
no need to apologize. I like it when people laugh. :)Delete
You and me both!
Oh my! So funny. Seriously!! So stinkin' funny! And yes, chickens are pretty darn stupid. Hopefully your children were not scarred for life. Dead chickens build character, right?ReplyDelete
I'm glad you got a laugh out of it. With the size of their heads and brains being so small, it shouldn't come as any surprise that they are stupid. And yet...Delete
No, the children aren't scarred. This is far from their first dead chicken encounter.
Hahaha! I'm laughing out loud, seriously! I have always told Husband that we will not EVER have chickens. Cows, horses, I can handle. I'm not even sure I could handle pigs. I like to eat them, but to raise them... not in numbers anyway. If Little Boy wants one for the fair or something, okay. But not in numbers! I like cows... I'll stick with those.ReplyDelete
Hope you are feeling better! And no more Nyquil! :)
I love hearing people laugh. (or reading that people are laughing)Delete
I am afraid to get cows. My brother and husband have tried to talk me into it. The way our animals die around here, I'm scared of what we'll do with a dead cow.
I am feeling much better. No more Nyquil. Ever.
PS: Nyquil can be your friend. Sometimes.
PPS: No chicken fingers for dinner??
Laughing is always welcome here at the coop. No need to yell. :)Delete
So I've heard. That's why I took it. Man, I'm going to have to be really, really sick to ever take that stuff again.
No chicken for dinner. We only eat the chickens we kill on purpose. Who knows how long that bird was out there. It could have been up to four hours. Blood taints the meat if not bled out right away.
HAHAHA this is so funny! I'm not sure whether it's funnier that CHICKENSARETOTALLYSTUPIDANDYOUTYPEDLIKETHISWHICHISACTUALLYQUITEDIFFICULTNOWTHATI'MDOINGIT or that the chicken isn't fine. Glad you are though.ReplyDelete
It is hard to write like that! It took me longer to do those lines than all the others combined!Delete
Glad you liked the post. :)
That is all. Funniest post I've read in a long time.
Yay! I love it when I can get people to laugh.Delete
Suicidal chickens. Now I've heard it all.ReplyDelete
You are welcome. Glad to be the one to complete your education. :)Delete
You were featured over at the Speckled Goat and there were hot links to your dead pig (great pictures) and your dead chicken...so does it make me weird that I felt compelled to read about the dead farm animals??? Since moving to a farm 10 years ago, I know they are an adventure. New follower (so I can keep reading about dead animals LOL) so I can read about a real farm with animals - no more cows, pigs or chickens here, only horses, cats and dogs. Even all the kids are grown and gone, so I'll just enjoy yours!ReplyDelete