Tuesday, December 17, 2013

There's an 8% Chance All Will Be Well

1/4:  distance in miles of our driveway, which is currently a treacherous ice slide of death
12:  days we've been dealing with this ice slide of death
2: vehicles which park in the circle in front of our house
0:  number of vehicles which park in our circle that are 4-wheel drive and able to turn around in/drive through the snow/ice
1:  number of people in our house who can safely drive a car in reverse
3,826:  number of times that one person has had to back out of/into the quarter mile ice slide of death in the past 12 days*
14:  number of times that one person may have made fun of or complained about the non-reverse driving person
92:  percent chance my butt will be in a ditch on the side of our ice slide of death for mocking COW

Only one more day until the temps get above freezing and begin to melt the ice slide of death.  Keep your fingers crossed that I don't have to learn my lesson the hard way on this one.

Thanks.

*may be a bit of an exaggeration.  But not by much.

Have a lovely day!

32 comments:

  1. I don't like math. :(

    ...that said, I am praying for your safety...because 8% isn't too great. Even this math-whiz knows that! ;)

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    Replies
    1. Pity.

      Thank you! There's hope for you yet, then. :)

      Delete
  2. *facepalm* Mocking??!?!?

    Now why would you want to go and do a thing like that for? The guy is saving your ass from the icy death slide and you MOCK him? Seems like your options from now are 1) Suck it up and learn to drive in reverse, on ice, or 2)...

    (seriously though, be safe.)

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    Replies
    1. Perhaps I wasn't clear. I'M THE ONE DOING THE REVERSE DRIVING!!!!! I have to get the car all ready for him to drive forward. That means backing the car out and back in when I take Phoenix to school in the morning. And when my mom was here for three days, I had to back her car in and out, too. I'm going to be going in a ditch for making fun of him, because he can't for the life of him drive in a straight line when driving backwards.
      I'm saving his life.
      But I'll try to be safe. :)

      Delete
  3. My driveway is much shorter than yours and you don't even have to pull up in it...you can just park in the street and totally block the driveway if you want to. :)

    But try not to kill yourself on the ice when you walk UP the driveway.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah, yours was ice-free! The beauty of concrete.

      Delete
  4. I'm impressed you can drive in reverse... and on ice! Stay safe!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I never knew it was a skill until I married COW. I'm doing my best, thanks!

      Delete
  5. Oh boy. Nothing nastier than an ice storm combined with a LONG driveway.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is nasty, all right. Layers of snow, ice, snow, rain, freezing temps to make it uneven ice, and more snow make it horrible.

      Delete
  6. Your odds here aren't all that good. Come on warmer weather so that ice will disappear.

    Have a safe, warm day. ☺

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    Replies
    1. Not good at all. Each time I do it again, I think, "Will this be the one I don't make it?" Warmer weather is almost here.
      Thanks!

      Delete
  7. Only 14 times??? You're a Saint! Pretty sure it would've been closer to the 3,826 in our house. ;P

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    Replies
    1. Ha! He really is hopeless. It's only on the worst days that I say anything. :)

      Delete
  8. Ok, wait- YOU are the awesome reverse driver! Hats off to you, lady! ;) I am a terrible reverse-driver, and an even worse ice driver. That sound treacherous. Thanks for amusing us and stay safe!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, yes I am. (And now that I've said that, my chances of going off the side of the drive are now 95%)
      My first day behind a wheel was at 6:30am the day school was cancelled for snow. We lived in the snow belt. School didn't get cancelled for a couple inches of snow. I learned real quick how to drive on ice.
      Thanks!

      Delete
  9. Did you put some gravel or salt on the ice sheet? I hate driving in bad conditions, yieks!!

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    Replies
    1. We would, if the ice sheet wasn't 1/4 mile long. It takes 2 dump trucks of gravel to cover our drive. What we need is to pave the driveway, but it was lower on the budget's to do list than the new kitchen. Someday...

      Delete
  10. You shoul post a photo from the road so they can really appreciate what you do.

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    Replies
    1. I'm too busy gearing up for the drive up to take a photo. :)

      I did forget to mention, this reverse-driving usually takes place in the dark.

      Delete
  11. I cannot even begin to fathom ANY of this! Please, please, please stay safe!

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    1. I'm not worried about getting hurt, but I am worried about getting our car (or even worse, the van!) horribly stuck. This should be the last day. I can hear the snow melting as I type. (Honestly, it's dripping down the rain gutters.)

      Delete
  12. OMG I am sorry but I am totally cracking up here. Yes you will be bruising your tailbone this afternoon for mocking COW. But the pain will be totally worth it. I am sending warm thoughts your way in hopes to thaw the ice!

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! So far, my butt is safe and the ice is melting. This round, I think I'm good. It's still early in the winter yet. (oh wait, it's not even winter yet. Crap.))

      Delete
  13. I am feeling the utmost compassion right now for COW. I am the one in the family who sits in tight parking spaces despairing of ever getting out. I pray for help to come and it usually does, in the form of my husband, who is a far superior driver.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Christine, you make dealing with harsh winter weather sound like too much fun!

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  15. ROFL! This reminds me why I am Soooo happy we moved to Arizona from Colorado! I hope it thaws out a bit for you :-)

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    Replies
    1. The thaw has begun, thank goodness. Ah, but when we get to July, will you still be glad to be in Arizona? :)

      (Glad to see you again!)

      Delete
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  17. But at least it's flat, isn't it? Who am I kidding? You're in Indiana. Of COURSE, it's flat. I swear our next car is going to have 4-wheel drive. I HATE being stranded at home when the weather gets bad, because we live on a hill. In a historic neighborhood with narrow streets. And some expensive cars parked on them.

    Can COW parallel park? Because my husband can't, and I think it goes hand-in-hand with the inability to drive in reverse.

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Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you're thinking!