Thursday, September 25, 2014

Twists of Many Kinds, None of Which Are Edible

The situation:  Indianapolis, specifically the south side of Indianapolis, has a large population of Burmese refugees.  Five children in Cuckoo's class are children of refugees.  Because he notices everything, Cuckoo noticed that these children's parents don't speak English.  And because he must talk everything to death, we had a long discussion about refugees.  I then put it out of my mind.

The mostly unexpected twist:  I never told Bryan about this conversation.  He took a couple of kids to McAlister's one night, and as they waited to order, Cuckoo noticed a Burmese family already seated.  Because he frequently restarts conversations completely out of the blue, he turned to Bryan and asked, "Why are brown people here?" Bryan is baffled and shocked and embarrassed and immediately started the shushing.  Cuckoo cannot be shushed.  Instead, he perked up and said, "OH!  I know! There are better houses here!"

FYI:  That's not what I said.

The situation:  Turken finally lost his first tooth!

The unexpected twist:  He lost it at 3:00 in the morning.  He came into our room to tell us.  I was only half awake and told him to leave the tooth on my dresser.  We would take care of it in the morning.  I didn't even ask him if he was bleeding.  And then, in the morning, I never even saw the tooth.  It was a busy day, and I was in a hurry to get out of the house.  I didn't get home until after he was in bed, with the tooth securely placed under his pillow.  The tooth fairy took it, so I actually never even saw that first lost tooth once it came out of his mouth.  Poor, poor 5th child.

This is the best photo we could get of him showing off the space in his teeth. Photogenic is not his middle name.

The situation:  Last week several teachers and Bryan and I filled out assessments.  On Monday, we got word from Phoenix's doctor that she is sure he has ADD.  We had pretty much assumed it before this, and had been trying all sorts of things to help him get himself together.  Nothing worked.  So we decided to put him on the lowest dose of Vyvanse (a prescription medicine).  The plan was to start the meds on Wednesday morning.

The startling twist:  For a variety of reasons, I couldn't get the prescription picked up until right before the pharmacy closed on Tuesday.  I came into the parking lot from the back of the building, and when I pulled around the side of it, I almost ran into a car.  It was parked parallel to the building, and a police car, with lights flashing, was parked behind it.  As my eyes tried to adjust to the headlights of two cars pointed directly at me, another police car careened into the lot and pulled up next to the other police car.  I then noticed a man with his hands high in the air standing in the line of the headlights of the first police car.  I may not be the most street smart fake farmer in the world, but I knew that was no place for me to be.  I slowly backed up and nonchalantly left the lot.

Phoenix started his meds on Thursday.

The situation:  The day for the pigs to leave for the butcher arrived.  After much gnashing of teeth, eye-opening revelations, and hard work on Bryan's part, the two remaining pigs were in the barn waiting for the real farmer/pig transporter to arrive.  Loading the pigs shouldn't be too hard, so I was on my way out the door to take Star to practice then on to Phoenix's first official game as a varsity player.  I even remembered to take my camera.

The very predictable twist:  Nothing is every easy when pigs are involved.  As Star and I headed for the car, I decided to stop and take a quick photo of the tractor backed up to the barn.  You know, for a stock photo in case I ever needed it.  I snapped one...


and then a second shot, since the dogs had moved into their normal, pig-loading position.



Notice anything wrong in the photos?  (In the first one, the pig's head is barely visible, just squeezing between the barn and the cage Bryan and the farmers were trying to get him into.)

I threw the camera in my car and started hobble-running down to the barn, yelling, "Ouch!  Pig's out!  Ouch!  Pig's out!"  Fortunately, the dogs stayed right on the line and kept the pig from heading out into the open yard.  I managed to get down there before it got around the corner to the backside of the barn.  It turned around and headed towards the big barn.  I knew that if it got to the other side of that barn, we'd be in gigantic trouble, so I hobble-ran around to the other side, this time only yelling, "Ouch!  Ouch!"  I got there just in time to throw a food trough in the path of the pig.  It turned him around and straight at one of the real farmers.  Between him, the dogs, and luck, they got the pig back into the barn.

I never did see Bryan during the debacle.  Pretty sure he was trapped in the barn.

The situation:  Cuckoo isn't the biggest fan of being kissed, but he does allow me to kiss him occasionally.  Each morning he gets out of bed and comes to cuddle on my lap.  I have to ask him if it is a kissing day or not before I plant one on the top of his head.

The naughty twist:  Earlier this week, before I could even ask, he said, "It will be a kissing day...if you let me watch TV.  If I can't watch TV, it will not be a kissing day."  It seems the big kids have yet to tell their little brother that it is never a good idea to give Mom an ultimatum.  That boy will never see another episode of Wild Kratts if he keeps this up.

The situation:  Loads of things have been happening around here that I want to write about.

The way that it is twist:  Because of those things, I have no time to write about them properly.

Oh well.  I'm pretty sure you'll live.

Have a lovely day!

23 comments:

  1. Kids can be so embarrassing at times. Yes they can. I wonder where he got the better houses here part? Selective hearing already?

    I laughed out loud with the pig story. That was hilarious except for the ouch parts.

    You're one busy person.

    You have a lovely day too. ☺

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    1. Yes, yes they can. He is also known for picking out one little word or phrase and making it the point of the entire conversation. I wasn't going to go into what a refugee really means, so I was going for the "they were able to have a better living here" angle. Seems it wasn't completely received the way I intended.

      Ack, even the ouch parts were funny. It didn't hurt that badly. ;)

      Lately, I really, really am.

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  2. Love the pig story, especially the 'ouch' parts. I can't believe they've gone already, it doesn't seem five minutes since they arrived :(

    Have a read of my 'Hemsby' post for another tale with a twist, let me know what you think :)

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    1. Ha! Especially the ouch parts indeed. :) I, too, feel like they weren't here long. Mostly because I rarely saw them this summer. However, my boys will adamantly argue with us.

      I saw you had another post up. I'll get to reading it asap!

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  3. Heehee!! You can always get a smile from me. Situation #1 is prolly the most awesome and hilarious. I remember doing something similar to my mother once. "Mom, why is that man so fat?" Oh boy. Did I get a talking to in the car!

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    1. Good. My goal is to make people smile as much as possible. :)

      Hahaha!! Honesty in kids is awesome when it's not embarrassing us. :)

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  4. Perked right up with the ADHD reference. Inattentive type? (I'm guessing so since you dropped the H.) I've worked a lot of with kids with ADHD (my education field's dyslexia and there's a ton of overlap), plus I have a husband with it (Inattentive and Hyperactive) and a daughter with it (Inattentive only...as yet). It's an interesting disability. Lots of research, huge variance in symptoms. Can make teaching challenging but often very rewarding. I bet going for the meds was a hard decision. As a teacher, I have seen such an enormous difference in huge ways (ability to retain learned materials, for instance), but as a parent, I dread the day of that conversation. Vyvanse is good, though. It's the one that's not a stimulant, right? That Phoenix, I just like him.

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    1. Yes, inattentive. It's part of the reason it took so long to identify.
      Giving him medication wasn't a hard decision in the end. It was just so hard to see him struggling so very much. I'm all for kids needing to work through problems, but this has been going on too long. We need to try something else. I have heard from several people that Vyvanse was a good medicine. Very few side effects. It is a stimulant, according to my doctor, but it isn't one that is as addictive as others.

      He is a good kid. I don't know anyone that doesn't like him. But thanks for saying so. :)

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  5. Omg.. The pig story.. I would've been running in the opposite direction! And I loved the kissing ultimatum.. Yes, ultimatums are bad, bad, bad.. But, ya' gotta' admit.. That's a wise boy ya' got there.. Didn't take him long to figure out a strategy, huh? ;) - I really enjoy your posts...

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    1. I had to save it! That was hundreds of dollars running loose!
      Wise might be the wrong word. I'm thinking more calculating...shrewd...devious. :)

      Thank you!

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  6. I remember losing a tooth one time when I was about 7 or so. I checked under my pillow the next morning, and my tooth was there and no money. I went to my mom and dad's room and announced the tooth fairy forgot to come, and my mom sleepily said "go get a dime out of my billfold." And this is how I found out the tooth fairy wasn't real. Sad, isn't it?

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    1. Ha! Sad, but I totally get your parents. Really, who came up with this tooth fairy fraud anyway?

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  7. ...Because he frequently restarts conversations completely out of the blue, sounds like a certain worldview I am rather familiar with….question is, if you do it to him (you might need to write down the last sentence in a conversation from, say, late Wednesday) and start (re-start) a previous conversation, will he simply continue? lol

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    1. Ha! I will have to try that on him! Thanks for the idea! (And yes, I will have to write it down.) Of course, I could just be opening up a can of backfiring worms in which I have to endure a beat a dead horse conversation.

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  8. Cuckoo has a bright future ...wow what is he 4 or five and he has the bargaining thing going on - smart boy!

    All your children are good kids I can see it in your posts and the pics. I'm happy for Phoenix that he is getting the right meds - its so hard to see them struggle. We probably will need to do the same again for Amelia - not sure if its ADD but thinking more of a dyslexia diagnosis...its so hard I have no idea how to get her tested for that and why the school has not done anything for her. I mean she has an IEP and has the resources but they only calling it delayed - its frustrating.

    "The pigs are going to the butcher?!" asked the city gal....nah just kidding. I would love a nicely stocked freezer for the winter...will you make sausages too. My family (parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles ..it was a family affair ) always made Italian sausages, sopressata (dried sausage) and prosciutto...yum!

    Good post, enjoy the weekend! We are having summer like weather here.
    :)

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    1. He's barely five, and it scares me more than a little.
      That sounds very frustrating. I hope you find the answers, and more importantly the help, you are looking for.

      We do make sausage. The butcher makes 1-pound packages of sausage, but Bryan has a sausage stuffer and makes links out of ground pork.

      Thanks!

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  9. I love all your posts. I'm smiling as I read this. There is always a twist, isn't there? The potential pig escaping story was playing out in my head like a Loony Tune. And Turken is too photogenic. And Cuckoo - the negotiator. LOL.

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    1. I'm glad! It does seem like everything comes with a twist. Good thing I'm getting good at flying by the seat of my (twisted) pants. :)

      I should put the pig photos to music one of these days! How funny would that be!

      He is so much cuter in person. :) That he is. I'm in serious trouble.

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  10. Y'all got twists coming outta your twists! I dread to think what will happen when CUCKOO loses a tooth! Will he just not even bother, and chuck it away? Who knows?!

    Glad Phoenix has a diagnosis and meds and that he's started them. I really, really, really hope they help. I think starting a day later was the right move!

    Well done you for foiling the piggie's plan for freedom. And YAY BACON!

    Hope you get to write more soon x

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    1. Or he will come and put it on my nose while I sleep, just so I don't forget it.

      Me, too.

      Yay bacon! and ham hocks. I can't wait for some ham and bean soup!

      Me, too. I miss writing and reading.

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  11. I love your kid stories! It sure was nice of Turken to let you know at 3am that he lost that tooth. What a guy! And Cuckoo cracks me up. What a crazy happening at the pharmacy! Good idea you had there to just back up and go home.

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    1. Darn nice of him. I'm kind of surprised he didn't swallow it.
      He cracks up just about everyone.
      I was quite taken aback by the pharmacy episode. Not a good place to be, for sure.

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  12. TV for kisses? Sneaky little bugger (and totally worth it, I'd say but I'm really easy that way). Tucker recently has stipulated "only DRY kisses" - oof. And haha to the poor little piggie who tried to escape. I can't say I blame him (her?). Yikes to the pharmacy thing. That's kinda scary actually. Glad your street smarts kicked in, fake farmer (tee hee!!!).

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Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you're thinking!