Tuesday, March 4, 2014

It's Buttercup's Birthday, So I Shall Regale You With Her Birth Story. I'm Sure That's How She Wants Us to Celebrate.

One of my favorite parts of pregnancy is the anticipation.  There at the end, when each day you wake up thinking, "Is today the day?" the waddling and pressure on the bladder are just a little more fun and exciting as far as I'm concerned.  I enjoy making up all the contingency plans of who to call if I have to rush to the hospital.  Who is going to be the relative to drive to town?  Where will COW be when I go into labor?  Will I be driving myself?

I love it all.

With all of the boys, I was able to have that fun and unpredictableness of a normal delivery.  Not so with Buttercup.  It wasn't that anything was wrong health-wise, but that I was naive and didn't have the information I needed to make the right decisions.

I didn't know my doctor well when I began my prenatal appointments with her.  She was the same doctor I had with Phoenix, but I only saw her twice before he was born.  (We moved to Indy in the middle of the summer, and he was born three weeks early on Sept. 3.)  She was simply a referral from my doctor from Bloomington.  She was fine, if not warm and fuzzy, throughout the first 8 months.

When we got closer to full term, she started pestering me about my hospital choice.  I wanted to deliver at the same place I had Phoenix, while she wanted me to go to a different one.  It had nothing to do with the safety of the baby or me, but everything to do with her convenience.  I held my ground each time she asked.

Two weeks before my due date, the doctor asked if I would like to have the baby over the weekend.  I was flabbergasted.  I had no idea a woman could schedule a date to have a baby unless it was Cesarean.  COW and I went through the pros and cons as we knew them.

Cons:  We'd have to deliver at the hospital the doctor chose.  Scheduling a birth just didn't feel right, either.

Pros:  We didn't know anyone in town to call to watch Phoenix if I went into a quick labor.  It would be handy to have someone already scheduled to be here.  Plus, COW could relax and not be so worried about going to work as the due date got closer.  And, when Phoenix was born, it was proven that COW is a horrible packer of the hospital suitcase.  With an induction, I could do it, and do it correctly.

We agreed to the induction.

My sister came to town to watch Phoenix, and at 6:00 on Saturday morning we headed to the hospital.  It was quite bizarre, really, to go in without a single sign that the baby was ready to come out.  It didn't feel right.

I was already 2cm dilated, so the doctor went straight to Pitocin.  So began the most unnatural 8 hours of my life.

Once the Pitocin was started, I wasn't allowed to leave the bed.  This is a problem when one is hooked up to an IV.  The amount of fluids being pumped into a pregnant woman is crazy, and that pregnant woman has to pee.  Frequently.  My doctor wouldn't let me go.  Instead, she insisted I use a bedpan.  While being held over it by COW and a nurse.

Sorry for that image.  Delete it from your mind.

I had no idea that, in fact, I am in charge of the delivery.  I was too naive to simply ignore the woman and go to the bathroom.  Fellow life-long rule followers, you know what I mean.

In case you are unaware, Pitocin is one horrible, nasty drug.  Pitocin makes your body have contractions against it's will, thus making them much more painful than natural labor.  I did not know this at the time.  I just knew that by 9:00 I was in some unbearable pain.  I called out loud and clear for the epidural.

The epidural was in, but unlike the one I had with Phoenix, it didn't work.  One side of my body was fine, but the other felt every single contraction.  There was some relief, but it was still beyond uncomfortable.  There was some fiddling with it, but no change in pain management.

With the epidural now in place, and the contractions coming faster and harder, there was no way I was going to be able to use a bedpan.  The doctor ordered a catheter.

I will stop there.  No need for visuals.  Just know, they are no fun.

I was getting close to the end.  Contractions were right on top of each other, and I was ready.  Unfortunately, my doctor wasn't.  I had noticed that I barely saw her all day.  As I was nearing the pushing phase, I found out why.  I wasn't the only patient she had scheduled for induction that morning, and two of us were ready to pop.  The doctor kept running back and forth to see which baby was going to be born first.  Apparently I lost, as I was told in no uncertain terms that I wasn't to push until the doctor arrived.

So we waited.

I have to admit I was a bit confused as to why they were so nervous about me pushing.  With Phoenix, I pushed for 2 hours, and for most of that time the doctor wasn't in the room.  I was curious as to why I wasn't allowed to now.

Finally, the doctor rushed into the room and told me I could push.  I pushed twice, and Buttercup was born.

I could not have been more shocked.  Two pushes??  That's it??  Shocked, I tell you.

As I held my baby, the doctor cleaned up and waved goodbye.

A year later, I was talking with a woman, and she told me about the delivery of her daughter several years prior.  The story sounded similar to mine in that she was induced before her due date, more than one woman was scheduled the same day, and the doctor was running back and forth to figure out who was delivering first.  The only difference is, my friend's baby almost died.  The doctor wasn't around to see what was happening, so she couldn't do anything to fix the situation.

We had the same doctor.

I learned a few things through this delivery.  First and foremost, I would never, ever be induced again.  Secondly, I learned to ask more questions when looking for a doctor.  I didn't want a doctor who made medical decisions based on her desire to make her own life easier.

It was a good thing I learned these things, as I became pregnant again when Buttercup was only 5 months old.

We shall end this story with the one beautiful thing to come from the experience.

(You had to know a photo montage of the birthday girl was in your future.)

Happy 14th Birthday Buttercup!

First day of preschool



She could not have been more thrilled with the cats (and new kittens) which came with the house.

Once the pigs get past this size, she isn't nearly so happy to go in the pen with them.

First Holy Communion

with COW's grandpa.  He loved her best.  Every single time we visited, she stuck to his side the entire time.  He cried every single time the visit ended.

She perfected that look at a very young age.

She has been reading to her brothers since she was 3 years old.
If you are a glutton for a birth story, you can find the others by clicking the boys' names:

Phoenix
Giant
Turken
Cuckoo

You will notice that Star is missing.  His birthday is in June, so look for his story then.

Have a lovely day!

35 comments:

  1. FRIST to wish Buttercup a very happy birthday :)

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  2. What a horrendous time you had during Buttercup's birth - I'm truly shocked that you were treated like that! Thank goodness both you and she came through it okay.

    Love the photos, especially the one with the cat. And the first communion one is gorgeous, I hope you have that framed and up on your wall.

    Anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUTTERCUP, hope you have a great day! :)

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    1. It wasn't pleasant, but at least things ended well.

      I have always loved that communion photo. We don't have many pictures hanging on the walls. The few we do have get knocked over and broken, so we don't bother. Maybe someday. :)

      I will pass the well wishes along! Thank you!

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  3. Happy Birthday Buttercup. Love, Nana.

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    1. Sharon! Good to see you here! :) I'll pass on the birthday wishes.

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  4. Oh I am so sorry for that birthday story! At least you got a happy ending. I was induced with all of my kids (except that c-section) and I LOVED it. Mine was urgent I had pre eclampsia with 5 of them. I don't mind the petocin but had great epidurals until the last one. I'd say your doctor was pretty rotten to schedule you for her convenience! Seriously scary that she did that!
    That pink jammie picture! Love it!
    Ok i've been a little behind when did you change the cover? I like it, reminds me of a book but I'll have to think of which one.

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    1. I didn't realize you had pre eclampsia that many times! Good heavens, that is nasty business. She wasn't the most professional doctor, for sure.

      It has always been one of my favorite photos. It was one of the photo shoots that got people asking me to take photos of their kids. The birth of the photography business, if you will.
      I just changed it one Saturday night. Not far behind at all. :)

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  5. ♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
    ♪♪Happy Birthday to you,♪♪
    ♪♪Happy Birthday Dear Buttercup,♪♪
    ♪♪Happy Birthday to you.♪♪

    She's a beauty too. ☺

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    1. Thank you. I will pass the song along.

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  6. Happy birthday to her!
    That is some look she can muster--what a stare!
    Glad it turned out okay in the end--what a crazy birth story!
    And how do you figure that doctor didn't think you'd find out the whole story? Those kids would be the same age, surely you'd meet and talk sometime about your shared experience!

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    1. Oh, she has got some looks to kill, for sure.

      The south side of Indy isn't that big. There were lots of people I knew who went to her, and similar birth stories were told. However, people who were past child-bearing age loved her. Very odd situation, to be sure.

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  7. YOUZA!!! I...I...I'm speechless. :O.

    Happy, happy 14th birthday to Buttercup!!! I love your photo montages. Off to read about your boys now. :D

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    1. You? Speechless? Never!

      I'm glad somebody besides me likes them. :)

      I will pass on the birthday wishes!

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  8. Happy happy birthday, Buttercup! LOVE the pictures...such a beautiful young lady!

    Now, that is quite a birth story! Wow...just wow! Glad you changed doctors...that is super-scary stuff, for sure! Sorry you had to experience that! And not that you need me to validate you, but you are right: petocin is AWFUL! I had it with the 12yo, which was not scheduled. And I had a scheduled c-section with the 10yo...but in looking back I wish I hadn't done it that way.

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    1. I will pass the message along. She is a beaut, isn't she?

      Awful! I also had pitocin with the oldest two boys as well, and it was just as awful those times. And, as I found out with the birth of Giant, completely unnecessary.

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  9. Well....this comment could get to be a mile long if I blathered on and on like I know I *could* when it comes to birth stories, but....

    So, I was induced with ALL THREE of my kiddos. Same doctor each time. A very sweet and kind man who passed away in 2007 and I miss him terribly (another story for another day). With kid #1 -- doctor was worried about ...something, I honestly don't remember what. Might have been baby getting too big for me to deliver or something.. Kid #2 -- I was TEN....count 'em ...10!! days overdue! Kid #2 was born weighing in at 10 lbs 2 oz. Kid #3 -- My blood pressure was getting ...well, doctor was very worried for me so and baby was also getting very big. We induced and baby #3 was born exactly 3 years and 1 DAY after baby #2, in the same room no less. She weighed in at 10 lbs 7 oz....and she ..was a week early. ANYWAY....all this to say is that 1. reading your description of labor on Pitocin, I was nodding my head (as if you could see me) oh, how I can relate. It is HORRENDOUS and INTENSE! also, I don't have anything else to compare it to. 2. There are valid reasons to induce. All three of mine were valid. My doctor never did it because he wanted to go golfing or wanted it over so he could have his weekend free. ;) 3. Your doctor sounds hideous. I hate her and I don't even know her. Horrible, horrible doctor. I hope she is not in practice anymore. There is NO reason you shouldn't be able to leave your bed while on pitocin... I got up, went to the bathroom, walked up and down the halls, and even took a bath in the jacuzzi....Read point #3 again. She was awful.

    And....then...those pictures of Buttercup. Can I make it official to betroth my 14yr son and her? From your other posts and this one, she is beautiful inside and out! Happy Birthday Buttercup!! :)

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    1. p.s. NEW header = AWESOME!!!!

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    2. There are most certainly valid reasons for inducing. Unfortunately, the definition of "valid" is expanding to include convenience for some.
      And while we're on the topic, good heavens, you make big babies! I thought my 9+ babes were large!
      My doctor was not a happy person. I forgave her long ago and actually felt bad for her. I heard from a nurse in the hospital that my doctor was in a horrible profession for her circumstances. It seems she was unable to have children and became quite bitter about it. Helping all of these woman give birth was just too much for her. She isn't practicing anymore, but not because of her record as a doctor. She lost her eyesight.

      From what I know of your son, I have no problem with the arrangement. It would be wonderful to have you as a relative!

      I will pass on the birthday wishes.

      And thanks! It is awesome. I can say that without bragging, seeing as how I had nothing to do with it. :)

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    3. I totally agree with the term "valid" expanding. I am not for the "hey, let's induce so we can all be home for Christmas" ..or go golfing on Saturday...or whatever superfluous reason.

      Yes, I make big babies... lol...on my 3rd, it may have had something to do with the circus peanuts I craved all 9 months long! ;)

      hmmm...well, humility pill taken. *sigh* I feel bad about what I said about your doctor....I forgot to remind myself that everyone has a story. I really do try to remind myself of that when someone treats me unfairly or snaps at me (i.e. the cashier at the grocery store or the lady in the aisle at WalMart who cut me off with her cart). I feel bad for what I said-- I was writing 'off the cuff' and ...not that I need to per se, as she wasn't *my* doctor, but... ;) I forgive her too. :)

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    4. Don't feel badly. I should have said something in the post about her circumstances. It really is hard to remember the "everyone has a story" truth. I try so hard, yet can get pretty judgmental sometimes.

      Circus peanuts??? Those things are horrible! I have always wondered who kept them in business...

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    5. Apparently, Kari and my late (paternal) Grandmother did! Man that woman loved those things - never did understand the attraction!

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  10. Happy birthday Buttercup! I love the pictures.
    I had Pitocin while in labor with Davis because my water had broken and I wasn't dilating, it was awful! I'm sorry you had to go through that but the good news is that you got a healthy baby out of it! And I'm glad you changed doctors for the others.

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    1. Thank you!

      My water broke with all three big boys before any contractions started. With Phoenix and Star, the doctors made me start pitocin. The doctor I had for Giant didn't. It was the most unbelievably wonderful birth. And labor took exactly as long as the other boys' did. I'm thinking doctors are getting a little too quick to put women on that horrible stuff.

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  11. I'm a day late (which is actually good for me!). The doc I had with Nikki was great during the entire pregnancy. During my labor (induced) he insisted when her heart rate kept decelerating that she was fine and I could deliver naturally since I had before. My husband finally insisted (and not kindly) that he get the baby out NOW so I had a C-section. The next day the doctor came in and apologized because the cord had been wrapped several times around her neck. I thank God every day for her and I never saw that doctor again.

    Christine, your daughter is a beauty! Happy Birthday, Buttercup!!

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    1. And I'm 2 days late with the response. :/

      Good heavens! How scary! I'm kind of surprised the doctor told you about the cord, though. Good call on your husband's part!

      Thank you!

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  12. Is this a bad time to tell you I never, ever had a labor pain?

    Happy, happy birthday to Buttercup. She is stunning, and I love, love, LOVE the pictures, especially her First Communion one.

    Oh, and I'm a rule follower, too. I would never have questioned the doctor about not letting me get up and pee, or anything else. Is that a Scott thing or a Christine and Dyanne thing?

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    1. No, since I didn't have any with Cuckoo. However, if you would have told me while I was in the middle of a painful labor, I would have punched you. :)

      Thank you!!

      Good question for Clark. I would guess it's a scott thing. In this case, the doctor is higher up in the hierarchy, and we would fall in line.

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  13. Quite a story Christine! Imagery was lovely. LOL Lovelier still? Buttercup. Hope she had a wonderful birthday, Pisces girl that she is (like me) :)

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    1. Ha! Hope you managed to lose that image. :)

      She did have a nice birthday. It isn't over yet, though. Weeknight birthdays are tough around here, so she will get her dinner out another day.

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  14. Happy birthday to Buttercup! The pics are great - I particularly love the second one with the updo and the pink - such a girlie! :)

    So, Pitocin is the devil. I was told I had no choice about induction - that pissed me off right from word one - because of my "advanced maternal age" and the potential for gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, etc. - NONE of which I developed. There is a very long and protracted story that begins here and ends with the Hub being uncertain whether he was taking home a wife and baby or not. It was bad. I would never recommend induction to anyone based on our experience and the dozens of others who have told a similar story of induction horror.

    I am so sorry for your experience - I know it all too well. So glad that you and Buttercup came through OK!

    Happy happy birthday to you both!

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  15. Happy Birthday wishes to a beautiful girl! My mother used to occasionally throw at me that I was born ass first and have been that way ever since. I think that was the last time I mooned anyone, but apparently my mother thinks I'm an ass??? ;)

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  16. Beautiful girl. isn't is great to have a daughter? I only have one, too. I love my boys as well, but it's nice to have both.

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Thank you for taking the time to tell me what you're thinking!