"If you are going to do something, do it right the first time."
I say it when someone scrubs the floor, but I find milk spots still there.
I say it when someone cleans up the lunch dishes but fails to put any of the silverware in the dishwasher.
I say it when someone cleans his room but leaves junk all around the edges of the bed.
I'm pretty sure they appreciate it.
They also appreciate the fact that I practice what I preach.
Unfortunately, I sometimes practice it even when I shouldn't.
Take, for instance, when I'm playing in a sport of some kind.
I can't play half-way.
I have to give it my all.
When a person is running for a ball, I have to beat him.
And when I do, I have to injure myself in fine fashion.
Do it right the first time.
I got the results of my MRI on Monday morning.
The doctor handed me a paper with a list of the injuries I inflicted on myself.
It was half a page, listed from most problematic to least problematic.
With the fist line, I knew I was in big trouble.
"Acute, complete disruption of the anterior cruciate ligament."
I ripped that ACL right in half.
The next two lines didn't sound much better.
"Obliqued tearing of the medial meniscus posterior horn that extends through both inferior surface and meniscus periphery."
"Vertical tearing of the lateral meniscus posterior horn near the tibial attachment, most likely representing a radial-type tear."
I tore my meniscus pretty good, too. In more than one place.
"Bony contusions...blah blah blah".
I have bruises on two bones.
That's the worst of it.
I done injured myself but good.
Normally, I'd say let's get this surgery booked ASAP. Too bad this isn't a normal situation.
(Here comes the secret part...)
In June, Bryan and I will celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary.
Two weeks ago, we bought tickets to go on a trip we've postponed for 16 years.
It was supposed to be a celebratory trip after he graduated from law school, but I ended up pregnant with Phoenix. He was due four weeks after the bar exam, so we didn't go.
Two weeks ago, we bought tickets to fly to London, England.
My flight leaves three days before Bryan's. He isn't exactly social, so I am going early in order to visit with a friend who moved there with her family last year.
And the agenda includes a stop to meet one other special person.
*cough* Lizzi
If I have this surgery ASAP, we have to cancel our trip.
Not a chance in H-E-double hockey sticks is that gonna happen.
According to the doctor, if I am a good patient, staying on my crutches and not trying to do all the stuff, I will be able to walk and have fun on our trip. I won't be able to do everything we might have done before, but I will be able to do plenty.
So, a good patient I will be, then schedule the surgery upon our return.
I am taking anti-inflammatory medicine, in hopes that someday soon I will be able to see my knee cap.
Apparently, the bone bruising is what makes my knee hurt the most, so once that heals I'll feel much better.
I will use my crutches at all times. I will park my rear on the couch with my foot up at every possible moment.
When I told the kids what the doctor said, Giant commented, "All I heard is that we're going to be doing a bunch of extra work for three months."
Smart kid, that one.
Have a lovely day!
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Friday, May 9, 2014
I'm Just Glad the Week Wasn't Full of Mondays, TToT Week #47
So, Monday stunk. Worse than the decaying raccoon I mowed around last week.
If you don't know what I'm talking about, you can read the posts from the last three days. (Yes, it took three days to convey the horribleness of my Monday.)
It was the kind of day that could have sent even me, the eternal optimist, into a corner to wail and cry about all that is going wrong with the world. Yet I didn't. I couldn't. There were too many people showing me kindness and too many good things happening to allow me the time or give me the inclination to wallow.
So many things for which to be thankful...
1. My mom had already been planning to come up Tuesday-Friday. Sweet Mama, I don't know what we would have done without my mom this week. She did so, so much driving. Between kids' practices, my doctor appointments, the van getting fixed, and special events at school, much driving needed to be done. Not to mention the laundry and kitchen cleaning and lunch making she did. Oh, and Cuckoo's coughing up of phlegm on Wednesday morning. So glad I didn't have to clean that up. :)
2. The friend who drove down early Tuesday morning to give me some crutches. The crutches have been a game changer. While the scooting on my butt everywhere helped keep the floors dusted, it wasn't very practical.
3. Pain medicine. I am the sort who only takes medicine when I really, really need it. (I gave birth to three of my kids without so much as a Tylenol.) I haven't missed a dose this week. As uncomfortable as I still am, I can't imagine how awful I would feel without it.
4. Boatloads of people checking in on me and offering to help. Every day, the texts and messages have been coming in with offers. I haven't needed the help yet, but I have no doubt I'll be needing some next week. I am so blessed to have so many people who genuinely care for us, want to help us and go out of their way to do so.
5. Backpacks. They are a wonderful help when a person is on crutches and can't carry a purse. Also good for someone on crutches who needs to carry things from one part of the house to another. Two of those 100 backpacks I have under the bed are coming in quite handy.
6. The kids are doing good things. We just found out that Phoenix scored very well on a national Algebra I test. Buttercup was chosen for a huge honor at school by a panel of 12 teachers. Turken got to perform in his first mini-musical at school. Nailed it, even with only one arm.
7. The pigs are still alive. At least, I assume they are. I haven't been out to see a pig or chicken since Monday night. My family just may not be telling me that the pigs are dead, knowing I'd make them dispose of them. Very well could be that the pigs are out in the pen decaying as I type. I guess, then, I'll just be grateful not to know.
8. Bryan is such a good dad. He has been ridiculously swamped at work lately, but he has continued to put our family first. He hasn't worked late. He's gone to games and driven to practices. He's the best.
9. Simple things to keep little boys happy. Turken and Cuckoo were occupied for hours on the front porch. All they had was a bucket of water and one squirt toy each. It gave me the chance to lay back on the couch and even nap a bit. (This pain medicine can make me quite sleepy!)
10. Weather warm enough for two little boys to play with water outside. It's mighty helpful for a person on crutches, too.
Now, if I can come up with ten things for which to be thankful this week, surely you can.
What are they?
Have a lovely day!
If you don't know what I'm talking about, you can read the posts from the last three days. (Yes, it took three days to convey the horribleness of my Monday.)
It was the kind of day that could have sent even me, the eternal optimist, into a corner to wail and cry about all that is going wrong with the world. Yet I didn't. I couldn't. There were too many people showing me kindness and too many good things happening to allow me the time or give me the inclination to wallow.
So many things for which to be thankful...
1. My mom had already been planning to come up Tuesday-Friday. Sweet Mama, I don't know what we would have done without my mom this week. She did so, so much driving. Between kids' practices, my doctor appointments, the van getting fixed, and special events at school, much driving needed to be done. Not to mention the laundry and kitchen cleaning and lunch making she did. Oh, and Cuckoo's coughing up of phlegm on Wednesday morning. So glad I didn't have to clean that up. :)
2. The friend who drove down early Tuesday morning to give me some crutches. The crutches have been a game changer. While the scooting on my butt everywhere helped keep the floors dusted, it wasn't very practical.
3. Pain medicine. I am the sort who only takes medicine when I really, really need it. (I gave birth to three of my kids without so much as a Tylenol.) I haven't missed a dose this week. As uncomfortable as I still am, I can't imagine how awful I would feel without it.
4. Boatloads of people checking in on me and offering to help. Every day, the texts and messages have been coming in with offers. I haven't needed the help yet, but I have no doubt I'll be needing some next week. I am so blessed to have so many people who genuinely care for us, want to help us and go out of their way to do so.
5. Backpacks. They are a wonderful help when a person is on crutches and can't carry a purse. Also good for someone on crutches who needs to carry things from one part of the house to another. Two of those 100 backpacks I have under the bed are coming in quite handy.
6. The kids are doing good things. We just found out that Phoenix scored very well on a national Algebra I test. Buttercup was chosen for a huge honor at school by a panel of 12 teachers. Turken got to perform in his first mini-musical at school. Nailed it, even with only one arm.
7. The pigs are still alive. At least, I assume they are. I haven't been out to see a pig or chicken since Monday night. My family just may not be telling me that the pigs are dead, knowing I'd make them dispose of them. Very well could be that the pigs are out in the pen decaying as I type. I guess, then, I'll just be grateful not to know.
8. Bryan is such a good dad. He has been ridiculously swamped at work lately, but he has continued to put our family first. He hasn't worked late. He's gone to games and driven to practices. He's the best.
9. Simple things to keep little boys happy. Turken and Cuckoo were occupied for hours on the front porch. All they had was a bucket of water and one squirt toy each. It gave me the chance to lay back on the couch and even nap a bit. (This pain medicine can make me quite sleepy!)
10. Weather warm enough for two little boys to play with water outside. It's mighty helpful for a person on crutches, too.
Now, if I can come up with ten things for which to be thankful this week, surely you can.
What are they?
Have a lovely day!
Your hosts
A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, Mother of Imperfection, Rewritten, Thankful Me, The Wakefield Doctrine
Thursday, May 8, 2014
My Mom Suggested I Stop Blogging, Part 3; or For the Love of All That Is Holy, Will This Day Ever End??
So, to recap my Monday thus far...*
1. I realized the pigs had pneumonia.
2. My van was torn apart by the dogs as they desperately tried to get the squirrel which had scurried into the undercarriage.
3. I spent 2 hours at the car service place, missing a dentist appointment and the picking up of Turken from kindergarten, only to be told it would take up to 4 more hours and lots of money to fix the van.
4. I left without getting it fixed just yet, and thus had to listen to the awful alarm going off in the van screaming at me to FIX IT NOW!
4. (You didn't know this part.) I spent an hour with the kids at the pediatrician's office for checkups for 2 kids. Found out that Buttercup grew 3 inches last year, and that there is now a slight curve in her back. When Turken gets his follow-up x-ray, Buttercup will be getting one of her back.
4. I gave 2 pigs shots by myself while everyone was at school and work.
5. I made my kids assist me in giving shots to the other 2 pigs.
Now that you're caught up, we can get to the next part of my day...
**********************
It was the parents vs. kids soccer game at school on Monday night.
There were signs that I should have skipped the game. Or at least walked off the field after the game started.
There are always signs.
The first sign was over a year ago when I injured my ankle during a volleyball game. It was a bit of a red flag that said "Hey, Doofus! You're getting to old for this!"
I completely ignored it.
The second sign was the tangle I got into with another mom. We were both on defense, and we both went after a kid trying to score. I was running behind her, and my foot got tangled up with hers. We both went down. She landed first, then I landed on her legs.
Where she got cleats, I'll never know, but I know she had them on. One of them hit me right between the legs. The pain of getting cleated in the lady parts had me seeing stars. As I stood up and staggered around the field, I just kept asking her, "Am I bleeding or did I pee my pants?" She was laughing. I was trying to discreetly check my shorts while approximately 35 people played soccer around me.
Let me just say, that is not as easy as it sounds.
But did I leave the field?
Of course not.
I am a doofus of epic proportions.
I am way more competitive than any 42 year old, out of shape woman should be.
I "rubbed some dirt on it" and got back to playing.
A ball was kicked far into the parents' side of the field.
There was only one 8th grade boy running for the ball.
I knew I could beat him.
I took off at full speed.
Just as I got to the ball, my foot planted.
My body twisted.
I felt things ripping and tearing and stretching all up and down the outside of my right leg.
I landed in a heap on the grass.
I grabbed my knee and began rolling from side to side, trying not to cry.
Adults came to stand around and look at me.
I wailed.
"I'm going to need to go to the hospital! This is really bad! Oh, it hurts!"
Bryan came to kneel next to me.
He leaned on both knees to ask what hurt.
I almost punched him as I yelled, "DON'T TOUCH ME!"
One of the parents is a fireman, so he came to do his EMT duty.
Basically, he sat next to me to see if I was going to need CPR at any point.
After a couple of minutes, the pain lessened.
I started to think things might not be as bad as I first thought.
EMT and Bryan actually got me into a standing position.
To the crowd of adults, I simply said, "Well, that was dramatic."
I was drug/ I hobbled over to the sidelines and the game continued without me.
After the game, I hobbled over to the picnic shelter for the team pitch-in.
That is when I heard everyone's stories of my fall. Things like...
"I saw you go down, and I knew you weren't getting back up for a while."
"I heard your leg pop." (Three people said this.)
"I thought you had flopped and were just faking at first."
Really helpful stuff.
The rest of the week has been full of pain meds, doctor appointments, an MRI, swelling, and time on the couch.
On Monday I will meet with the doctor again to discuss the results of the MRI.
Pray that it isn't a tear requiring surgery.
I know you are all dying to know if I beat the kid to the ball.
Yes. Yes, I did.
*I just realized that I'm going to write just as many posts about Monday as I did about our entire week-long vacation. I don't think that's a good thing.
Have a lovely day!
1. I realized the pigs had pneumonia.
2. My van was torn apart by the dogs as they desperately tried to get the squirrel which had scurried into the undercarriage.
3. I spent 2 hours at the car service place, missing a dentist appointment and the picking up of Turken from kindergarten, only to be told it would take up to 4 more hours and lots of money to fix the van.
4. I left without getting it fixed just yet, and thus had to listen to the awful alarm going off in the van screaming at me to FIX IT NOW!
4. (You didn't know this part.) I spent an hour with the kids at the pediatrician's office for checkups for 2 kids. Found out that Buttercup grew 3 inches last year, and that there is now a slight curve in her back. When Turken gets his follow-up x-ray, Buttercup will be getting one of her back.
4. I gave 2 pigs shots by myself while everyone was at school and work.
5. I made my kids assist me in giving shots to the other 2 pigs.
Now that you're caught up, we can get to the next part of my day...
**********************
It was the parents vs. kids soccer game at school on Monday night.
There were signs that I should have skipped the game. Or at least walked off the field after the game started.
There are always signs.
The first sign was over a year ago when I injured my ankle during a volleyball game. It was a bit of a red flag that said "Hey, Doofus! You're getting to old for this!"
I completely ignored it.
The second sign was the tangle I got into with another mom. We were both on defense, and we both went after a kid trying to score. I was running behind her, and my foot got tangled up with hers. We both went down. She landed first, then I landed on her legs.
Where she got cleats, I'll never know, but I know she had them on. One of them hit me right between the legs. The pain of getting cleated in the lady parts had me seeing stars. As I stood up and staggered around the field, I just kept asking her, "Am I bleeding or did I pee my pants?" She was laughing. I was trying to discreetly check my shorts while approximately 35 people played soccer around me.
Let me just say, that is not as easy as it sounds.
But did I leave the field?
Of course not.
I am a doofus of epic proportions.
I am way more competitive than any 42 year old, out of shape woman should be.
I "rubbed some dirt on it" and got back to playing.
A ball was kicked far into the parents' side of the field.
There was only one 8th grade boy running for the ball.
I knew I could beat him.
I took off at full speed.
Just as I got to the ball, my foot planted.
My body twisted.
I felt things ripping and tearing and stretching all up and down the outside of my right leg.
I landed in a heap on the grass.
I grabbed my knee and began rolling from side to side, trying not to cry.
Adults came to stand around and look at me.
I wailed.
"I'm going to need to go to the hospital! This is really bad! Oh, it hurts!"
Bryan came to kneel next to me.
He leaned on both knees to ask what hurt.
I almost punched him as I yelled, "DON'T TOUCH ME!"
One of the parents is a fireman, so he came to do his EMT duty.
Basically, he sat next to me to see if I was going to need CPR at any point.
After a couple of minutes, the pain lessened.
I started to think things might not be as bad as I first thought.
EMT and Bryan actually got me into a standing position.
To the crowd of adults, I simply said, "Well, that was dramatic."
I was drug/ I hobbled over to the sidelines and the game continued without me.
After the game, I hobbled over to the picnic shelter for the team pitch-in.
That is when I heard everyone's stories of my fall. Things like...
"I saw you go down, and I knew you weren't getting back up for a while."
"I heard your leg pop." (Three people said this.)
"I thought you had flopped and were just faking at first."
Really helpful stuff.
The rest of the week has been full of pain meds, doctor appointments, an MRI, swelling, and time on the couch.
On Monday I will meet with the doctor again to discuss the results of the MRI.
Pray that it isn't a tear requiring surgery.
I know you are all dying to know if I beat the kid to the ball.
Yes. Yes, I did.
*I just realized that I'm going to write just as many posts about Monday as I did about our entire week-long vacation. I don't think that's a good thing.
Have a lovely day!
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
My Mom Thinks I Should Stop Blogging, Part 2
I have told you about the van and the damage the dogs/squirrel did to it. If you recall, I found the destruction when I went out to the van in order to go to the store for some needles and syringes. I was pretty sure our pigs had pneumonia. I hear pneumonia is quite common in hogs. Seems we've just been "lucky" that we haven't had any die from it in past years.
Signs our pigs had pneumonia:
1. They haven't eaten their food for 2 days straight.
2. They haven't shown interest in water for one day.
3. They only got up when I made them get up.
4. They were having trouble breathing. It is not normal for me to see pig bellies moving in and out with each breath.
5. Some coughing was heard.
Signs our pigs didn't have the same thing as last year's herd:
1. No one had diarrhea. (Including me.)
2. There were no dead birds in their waterer.
Treatment of pig pneumonia includes giving shots of antibiotics into the neck of each pig. Fortunately, thanks to last year's herd, I know how to do that. Two of the pigs were sicker than the others, and I was afraid to wait until Bryan got home to give them the shots. The longer I waited, the better chance one of them would die. Since the pigs are only 35-50 pounds each, I decided not to wait and just do it on my own.
The hard way to administer a shot in each of 4 pig's necks:
Step 1:
Step 1:
 |
| Using a 100-ft rope, chase the sick pig around the pen and wear him out. Occasionally toss the rope in an attempt to get it around the pig's neck. You won't actually get him, but it's good practice for when he slows down. It is likely you will get your rope completely tangled around one or both feet as you chase the pig. This step will take up to 15 minutes, but it will seem like 15 days. |
 |
| Once you have almost killed the pig from exhaustion, he will slow down enough for you to get the rope around his neck. Hold on for dear life when he gets his second wind, because he will kick and squeal and wiggle and throw himself at you in an attempt to get loose. This step should take up to 5 minutes. Your arms may come out of their sockets between minute 2 and minute 4. |
Step 3:
 |
| Eventually, the pig will wear himself out and stop fighting you. It is at this point that you will despairingly realize that the syringe was left in a safe spot on the other side of the pen. You will need to prod, poke, and drag the pig over there to retrieve the syringe. (In case you can't tell, this is my "despairingly" look.) |
 |
| Once you get to the syringe, straddle the pig, hold the rope with one hand, and stick the needle in the pig's neck with the other hand. Your hand may be shaking from the exertion of catching the pig in the first place. Don't worry if some of the medicine runs down his neck because you misjudged when to push the medicine in. |
Step 6:
 |
| In the melee of trying to wear out/catch the pig, you may accidentally rope the pig's hind legs instead of its neck. Go with it. At least you have the pig, and holding it this way will make the dragging to the syringe easier. Extra caution is needed, though, as the pig has a much better chance to whip around and bite you. |
 |
| Once you've drug him to the syringe, but before you pick up the syringe, you must get the rope around the pig's neck. Use one hand to hold the rear end of the rope and slightly lift the pig's back legs off the ground. With the other hand, get the rope around his neck. It will probably take a few tries. Hold tight while he bucks a bit more. As soon as he is calm, let go of the rope holding the hind legs. (All of the exertion may cause your hair to fall out, apparently.) |
Step 8: Repeat step 4.
Step 9: Decide that the other pigs are not in such dire need of their shots. Shaking and weak, head back to the house and collapse.
*************************
Two hours after this, on our way home from school, I told the kids that they were going to help me administer the shots to the other two pigs.
They were horrified until I told them they wouldn't have to actually give the shots.
Then they were simply terrified.
The easy way to administer a shot in a pig's neck:
Step 1: Gather 4 kid helpers.
Step 2: Explain to the helpers that there will be much noise and flailing and maybe some cursing. They shouldn't be afraid, as the pig is not getting hurt. I might be, but the pig won't be.
Step 3: Before the pigs can get out of the barn, get a gate in the doorway to keep them in there.
Step 4: Assign a job to each helper*.
 |
| 1. Gate holder: He is to hold that gate nice and tight, as the pigs will likely charge the gate when I start the "lassoing". Star got that job. 2. Back-up gate holder: It's a big gate, and pigs are strong. Buttercup took this job, but only after trying to avoid the vicinity altogether. She is a big wimp when it comes to needles. 3. Sneaky onlooker: Turken was bummed he didn't get a job, but he stayed to watch. 4. Shot assistant: He is to stay out of the way and hold the syringes high in the air. When I call for one, he needs to be quick and brave and bring it to me. Giant volunteered for this one. 5. Wrangler's assistant: Help get the pigs cornered and roped. He is also in charge of holding the rope around the hind legs while the shot is administered. Phoenix got this one. |
Step 6: Administer the shot. Piece of cake when someone is helping to hold the pig steady and another is handing you the syringe.
Step 7: Repeat steps 5 and 6.
Step 8: Step back and listen to the helpers.
Turken: That was a lot of noise!
Buttercup: I never opened my eyes the whole time.
Cuckoo: (He had nothing to say, as he played the usual scaredy-cat and took off for the house before we even began gathering the pigs.)
Giant: If you weren't struggling so much, that would have been funny.
********************
As of this posting, the pigs are doing much better. All 4 have been up and walking around on their own, and all 4 have been seen eating and drinking.
We really should be giving each of them another shot to make sure the bug is killed completely, but I am unable to do so, no matter how many helpers I have.
We'll save that story for Part 3 of our horribly awful, unbelievable day.
*I know some of you are wondering why I didn't assign one child to be the photographer. I would have had Turken do it, but with his broken collar bone, he's down to one arm. He can't take photos. Buttercup never opened her eyes, so she couldn't take photos. I needed all of the big boys to actually help, so no photographer.
Have a lovely day!
Monday, May 5, 2014
My Mom Suggested I Stop Blogging...
Not because she doesn't like reading it and seeing the photos of her grandkids, but because she thinks having a blog has tempted Fate into overloading me with plenty of blog fodder. I didn't agree with her until just now, this evening, as I sit and finish the post I started 10 hours ago.
To illustrate her point, I give you the story of my Monday.
One, single, unbelievable day.
It will take at least three posts to tell you what happened.
I'm not even kidding.
******************************
I slammed the ripped, torn, chewed, and otherwise shredded wires on the counter saying, "Will driving without these cause harm to my family or the general public driving on the open road around us?"
The Ford service guy simply looked at me with a "Please explain" look upon his face.
"Well, see, I had just told my 4 year old to get his shoes on. We were making an unexpected trip to Tractor Supply to buy some needles and syringes, seeing as how my 4 pigs I got 3 short weeks ago have come down with a case of pneumonia. As I put my shoes on, I heard the dogs giving their "I'm going to get you!" bark. The sound came from the vicinity of my van. I knew immediately that I was not going to like what I saw when I got to them.
I was right. As I got close to the scene, I heard the sound of an animal squealing and scurrying around the undercarriage of my van. For the sake of this conversation, we'll call the animal a squirrel. The squirrel was "in" my van, and the dogs were trying their best to save the van. By ripping it to shreds. These wires were all over the ground."
The Ford service guy slowly picked up a wire piece with a grin upon his face. As he inspected the piece, turning it this way and that, the grin became a full on smile. As he picked up another piece, he could hold it back no longer. With a chuckle, he asked, "Are any dash lights on?"
"Um, just about all of them. And there is an incessant blaring of an alarm. For every 5 minutes of quiet, there is one minute of (as my 4 year old said, "Mom! Mom! It sounds like the car is saying) 'larm alert! 'larm alert! It is rather annoying."
Before the service guy could say, "We'll take it and have a look," the guy who took my call 15 minutes prior came into the room. He barely managed to contain his guffaw as he commented, "Ah, the squirrel attack."
So I told them, "Oh, and I can't guarantee that it was a squirrel, nor that it actually ran out of its hiding place under the van. You may want to protect your face when you look up."
Cuckoo and I then spent 2 hours playing Uno, cancelling a dentist appointment, and getting a ride for Turken after kindergarten. We also walked to the only restaurant which didn't require a walk of Cuckoo death across 6 lanes of major road. Steak - n- Shake.
I had a steak(burger). And a shake.
Duh.
Side note: The way to get kids to be grateful for things is to never give them anything. When Cuckoo found out he was going to be allowed to take home the paper hat, the paper car, the placemat, and the 2 little crayons, he was happier than he ever was at Christmas. "I get to take ALL of this home?!?!?!"
After lunch, we walked back to Ford, where the service guy wasn't laughing anymore. I think he actually felt bad when he broke the news about the four hours of work and almost $600 it would take to get the van fixed.
Probably not as bad as me, though.
I had to go back to my original question. "But if I drive it, will it be dangerous? I don't really have 4 more hours to stay here. You know, 6 kids and 4 pigs with pneumonia and all."
I got the all clear to drive away, but made an appointment on Wednesday for the repairs.
We won't miss the appointment.
They couldn't turn that blasted alarm off, so it comes back on screaming, "Fix your van! Right now! Fix your van! Right now!" every five minutes. It is almost as annoying as Turken hollering, "I hate that noise! Oh, I hate that noise!" the entire time, every time, that alarm continues to beep.
Now, about those sick pigs...
I'll have plenty of time to write the post on Tuesday. You'll find out why in Post 3.
Have a lovely day!
To illustrate her point, I give you the story of my Monday.
One, single, unbelievable day.
It will take at least three posts to tell you what happened.
I'm not even kidding.
******************************
I slammed the ripped, torn, chewed, and otherwise shredded wires on the counter saying, "Will driving without these cause harm to my family or the general public driving on the open road around us?"
The Ford service guy simply looked at me with a "Please explain" look upon his face.
"Well, see, I had just told my 4 year old to get his shoes on. We were making an unexpected trip to Tractor Supply to buy some needles and syringes, seeing as how my 4 pigs I got 3 short weeks ago have come down with a case of pneumonia. As I put my shoes on, I heard the dogs giving their "I'm going to get you!" bark. The sound came from the vicinity of my van. I knew immediately that I was not going to like what I saw when I got to them.
I was right. As I got close to the scene, I heard the sound of an animal squealing and scurrying around the undercarriage of my van. For the sake of this conversation, we'll call the animal a squirrel. The squirrel was "in" my van, and the dogs were trying their best to save the van. By ripping it to shreds. These wires were all over the ground."
The Ford service guy slowly picked up a wire piece with a grin upon his face. As he inspected the piece, turning it this way and that, the grin became a full on smile. As he picked up another piece, he could hold it back no longer. With a chuckle, he asked, "Are any dash lights on?"
"Um, just about all of them. And there is an incessant blaring of an alarm. For every 5 minutes of quiet, there is one minute of (as my 4 year old said, "Mom! Mom! It sounds like the car is saying) 'larm alert! 'larm alert! It is rather annoying."
Before the service guy could say, "We'll take it and have a look," the guy who took my call 15 minutes prior came into the room. He barely managed to contain his guffaw as he commented, "Ah, the squirrel attack."
So I told them, "Oh, and I can't guarantee that it was a squirrel, nor that it actually ran out of its hiding place under the van. You may want to protect your face when you look up."
Cuckoo and I then spent 2 hours playing Uno, cancelling a dentist appointment, and getting a ride for Turken after kindergarten. We also walked to the only restaurant which didn't require a walk of Cuckoo death across 6 lanes of major road. Steak - n- Shake.
I had a steak(burger). And a shake.
Duh.
Side note: The way to get kids to be grateful for things is to never give them anything. When Cuckoo found out he was going to be allowed to take home the paper hat, the paper car, the placemat, and the 2 little crayons, he was happier than he ever was at Christmas. "I get to take ALL of this home?!?!?!"
After lunch, we walked back to Ford, where the service guy wasn't laughing anymore. I think he actually felt bad when he broke the news about the four hours of work and almost $600 it would take to get the van fixed.
Probably not as bad as me, though.
I had to go back to my original question. "But if I drive it, will it be dangerous? I don't really have 4 more hours to stay here. You know, 6 kids and 4 pigs with pneumonia and all."
I got the all clear to drive away, but made an appointment on Wednesday for the repairs.
We won't miss the appointment.
They couldn't turn that blasted alarm off, so it comes back on screaming, "Fix your van! Right now! Fix your van! Right now!" every five minutes. It is almost as annoying as Turken hollering, "I hate that noise! Oh, I hate that noise!" the entire time, every time, that alarm continues to beep.
Now, about those sick pigs...
I'll have plenty of time to write the post on Tuesday. You'll find out why in Post 3.
Have a lovely day!
Saturday, May 3, 2014
Hoping the Flower Photos Make Up for the Hints of Grouchiness, TToT Week 46
Intros are overrated.
1. I am thankful that the blogging A-Z challenge is over. I chose not to participate this year, but many people I know did. Great googly moogly, that was a boatload of reading I just didn't have time for! I'm just going to throw this suggestion out there. How 'bout next year, instead of everyone going at the same time in April, everyone takes a different month? The pressure of reading and writing would be off, and we read-only participants would have more time to actually read and encourage.
2. I am thankful for the warmer weather. Sure, it's not as warm as our springs usually are, but it's warmer than the winter. Our saliva is no longer in danger of freezing, so I am happy. To those who are complaining about the cool spring...People, remember the Polar Vortex. We aren't wimps anymore, so don't act like it.
3. I am thankful for packages in the mail. I received a cookbook from Lizzi (full of glitter, of course) a few weeks ago, and this week I received Tibetan prayer flags from Zoe. (I won a contest with a ridiculous obituary entry) I have always loved snail mail, but it's so rare to get any these days. I get so excited to find something that isn't a bill or an ad in my mailbox.
4. I am thankful for purple.
5. I am thankful that you all are still reading the blog. I've had some funny stuff happen around here lately, but I haven't had the time nor brain power to come up with a funny, creative way to tell the stories. Honestly, the story about getting refused service at Olive Garden should have made OJ come out of people's noses, but I could do nothing but boringly throw it in a quick take. Thank you for continuing to stick with me. I'll get my creative juices back soon, because...
6. I am thankful high school volleyball is over. Phoenix had so much fun learning a new sport, and he came a long way in his ability to play. Plus, I really enjoyed watching the matches. However, it's been taking a lot out of us. It's a good time for the season to end.
7. And, school soccer is over. Once again, loads of fun for Buttercup and Star and me and the little boys, but it was one more thing on the calendar requiring me to drive. I'm tired of driving.
8. I am thankful for not-as-serious-as-it-could-be injuries. Turken's collar bone did not break all the way through. Since it is just a small fracture, he won't be out of commission for too horribly long. Good thing, because the sight of him in the dugout while his team plays the field hurts my heart. He never complained and his coach was great about making Turken feel like he was still part of the team (Turken was the 3rd base coach while his team was at bat.), but we all are hoping this recovery goes quickly.
9. I am thankful for the non-rainy weather we had in the middle of each day this week. There was plenty of yucky, wet weather each afternoon and evening, but the middle of the days were mostly fine. I was able to dry lots of newly washed bedding on the line this week, as well as get some much needed mowing done.
10. I am thankful for my mom. We've seen a lot of her in the last month, and the kids and I couldn't be happier. (Bryan hasn't seen her much, since he didn't go on vacation with us, nor did he go to Ohio for the tournament with us.) She has beaten death three times in her life (a mysterious kidney ailment when I was in high school, a completely blocked artery requiring 2 heart stents 2 years ago, followed directly by a fight with cervical cancer.), so I am over the top grateful for every minute I get to spend with her. I've been hinting that she just needs to move to Indy, but that is just the selfish part of me coming out. I know how important her friends are to her, and that in Kentucky she is only a few miles from all of her other kids and grandkids. I'll just be super happy for the time I get.
Now that I've made my mom tear up, I shall turn the thankful train over to you. What has you all giddy with gratefulness this week?
Have a lovely day!
1. I am thankful that the blogging A-Z challenge is over. I chose not to participate this year, but many people I know did. Great googly moogly, that was a boatload of reading I just didn't have time for! I'm just going to throw this suggestion out there. How 'bout next year, instead of everyone going at the same time in April, everyone takes a different month? The pressure of reading and writing would be off, and we read-only participants would have more time to actually read and encourage.
2. I am thankful for the warmer weather. Sure, it's not as warm as our springs usually are, but it's warmer than the winter. Our saliva is no longer in danger of freezing, so I am happy. To those who are complaining about the cool spring...People, remember the Polar Vortex. We aren't wimps anymore, so don't act like it.
3. I am thankful for packages in the mail. I received a cookbook from Lizzi (full of glitter, of course) a few weeks ago, and this week I received Tibetan prayer flags from Zoe. (I won a contest with a ridiculous obituary entry) I have always loved snail mail, but it's so rare to get any these days. I get so excited to find something that isn't a bill or an ad in my mailbox.
4. I am thankful for purple.
 |
| The irises are right on time. |
 |
| Taking a photo of a lilac bush in gale-force winds is not an easy task. You heard it here first. |
5. I am thankful that you all are still reading the blog. I've had some funny stuff happen around here lately, but I haven't had the time nor brain power to come up with a funny, creative way to tell the stories. Honestly, the story about getting refused service at Olive Garden should have made OJ come out of people's noses, but I could do nothing but boringly throw it in a quick take. Thank you for continuing to stick with me. I'll get my creative juices back soon, because...
6. I am thankful high school volleyball is over. Phoenix had so much fun learning a new sport, and he came a long way in his ability to play. Plus, I really enjoyed watching the matches. However, it's been taking a lot out of us. It's a good time for the season to end.
7. And, school soccer is over. Once again, loads of fun for Buttercup and Star and me and the little boys, but it was one more thing on the calendar requiring me to drive. I'm tired of driving.
8. I am thankful for not-as-serious-as-it-could-be injuries. Turken's collar bone did not break all the way through. Since it is just a small fracture, he won't be out of commission for too horribly long. Good thing, because the sight of him in the dugout while his team plays the field hurts my heart. He never complained and his coach was great about making Turken feel like he was still part of the team (Turken was the 3rd base coach while his team was at bat.), but we all are hoping this recovery goes quickly.
9. I am thankful for the non-rainy weather we had in the middle of each day this week. There was plenty of yucky, wet weather each afternoon and evening, but the middle of the days were mostly fine. I was able to dry lots of newly washed bedding on the line this week, as well as get some much needed mowing done.
10. I am thankful for my mom. We've seen a lot of her in the last month, and the kids and I couldn't be happier. (Bryan hasn't seen her much, since he didn't go on vacation with us, nor did he go to Ohio for the tournament with us.) She has beaten death three times in her life (a mysterious kidney ailment when I was in high school, a completely blocked artery requiring 2 heart stents 2 years ago, followed directly by a fight with cervical cancer.), so I am over the top grateful for every minute I get to spend with her. I've been hinting that she just needs to move to Indy, but that is just the selfish part of me coming out. I know how important her friends are to her, and that in Kentucky she is only a few miles from all of her other kids and grandkids. I'll just be super happy for the time I get.
Now that I've made my mom tear up, I shall turn the thankful train over to you. What has you all giddy with gratefulness this week?
Have a lovely day!
Your hosts
A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, Mother of Imperfection, Rewritten, Thankful Me, The Wakefield Doctrine
Thursday, May 1, 2014
A New Job, a New Injury, a New Almost Outlaw, and Ways My Kids Showed Me Up, 7QT
The last 4 days have been full of firsts for our family. New adventures experienced, new skills learned, talents newly unveiled, new lows in the I don't feel like doing it department. I'm going to use my quick takes to tell you about 7 of them.
(Quick Takes are hosted by Jennifer Fulwiler. She is becoming quite famous in Catholic circles, on national radio and everything to talk about her new book, Something Other than God, in which she tells of her conversion from atheism.)
I have been taking the productive route this week, which included several days of mowing while the little boys had their quiet (there-is-no-way-we-are-going-to-nap-no-matter-how-tired-we-are) time. While mowing I came across a dead raccoon, which I estimate to be somewhere between 30 and 150 pounds. For the first time ever, (because yes, I come across dead animals in the yard all the time) I chose to not move it. I actually mowed around the nasty, smelly thing. I just wasn't in the mood for dealing with that mess. To dust that raccoon shall return, right where it was dropped off by the dogs.
(I'm going to save you from vomiting in your mouth and not show you a photo of the decaying coon.)
Buttercup has finally become part of the gainfully employed by refereeing a soccer game this week. It was cold and rainy, and she was completely miserable. But she earned $12 for that one hour of miserable. Totally worth it. This is a skill she will be able to use to make some great money throughout high school and college and into adulthood if she wants. When she refs a tournament weekend, she can come home with almost $200 in her pocket.
We play a lot of games at our house, and I am the kind of parent who doesn't let my children win. They have to earn that title of champion Boggle player, and are happy to do it. Lately, Cuckoo has been wanting to play checkers. While he does know how to play, I easily beat him while guiding him to look at moves differently. On Thursday, I wasn't paying the closest of attention. Like the hare, I was overly confident and didn't give Cuckoo enough credit. (In my defense, he is only 4 and a half.) And like that pesky Tortoise who slowly and steadily beat the hare, he cleverly and methodically took me out. Fair and square.
Our family is not known for our singing ability. When the kids try out for the school musical, they get put in roles that have absolutely no singing involved. The music teacher actually lets them down nicely by saying, "This song just isn't right for your voice." Bryan has no idea how to keep a beat, let alone stay on tune. I sound fantastic in my own head while I am belting out a good 80s song, but no one else seems to agree. The lack of ability in the children is expected. And then this week, Giant shocked us all. He was actually chosen to be a cantor at the school Mass. Sitting in the back of church, I heard him belt out his verse of the Responsorial psalm. He hit the notes. On time. And it was good. Shocking, I tell you!
After last year was dubbed Year of the Broken Bones, we have been doing great about staying injury-free since the new year began. Unfortunately, that changed this week. While goofing of with his brothers before Buttercup's soccer game on Sunday afternoon, Turken hurt himself. It wasn't until Monday morning, when he started walking crookedly and not using his left arm and complaining that his shoulder hurt and had a big lump of swelling show up on his collar, that we thought to get him checked out. Aaaaand, he has a broken collar bone. While it is not the first time we put off taking a kid with a broken bone to the doctor, it is the first time we did it with this particular child. And with that, Turken is inducted into the Coop of Broken Bone Doom.
Star is known as the "cup mostly empty" guy in our family. He just has a knack for sniffing out the bad in a situation, regardless of how good the rest of the situation is. Star has a giant jerk as a soccer coach, and his full jerkness came out swinging against Star during their tournament this weekend. I was beyond livid the entire two days. However, I knew that if I said anything, it would only get worse. (As Clark would be quick to point out...) Biting my tongue is not an easy thing for me to do, so I got very little sleep. Dreaming up all of the ways I would love to tell this guy off kept me up much of the night. As we were heading home on Sunday, Star shocked me. For the first time ever, that child had a better attitude than me. Not only was he not livid, he wasn't the least bit mad. While I was ready to head to the soccer fields on Monday, demanding Star be moved to a different team, he was calm and rational, telling me to wait and see how things progressed during the season. While I shouted, "Shut up and get mad like me!" in my head, I agreed to do things the way he wanted.
He proved to be right. There was another game on Wednesday. Star shined, making one of the best blocks I have ever seen. (He's a goalkeeper.) The kids on his team, the other team's coach, and his own coach showered him with high fives and "great jobs". Star managed to show the jerk that the jerk had made a mistake, and he did it in his own way.
Four ladies and a Canadian walk into an Olive Garden...
The four ladies would be three other soccer moms and me. The Canadian would be my mom, who joined Star and me at the tournament. The players and the dads went to a pro soccer game Saturday night, so the ladies went out for dinner and a drink.
During the meal, we told lots of funny stories and laughed our heads off.
It was prom night, so lots of couples were in the restaurant in all their prom finery. As the girls finished their meals and headed for the door, we asked them to stop at our table and show off their dresses, shoes, and flowers. The girls were thrilled, showing off and telling us all about their dresses, their dates, and their accessories.
At one point after we were done eating, we asked our waiter to get us a second round of drinks. (There was a bit of a wait before we were seated, so we each grabbed a first cocktail from the bar before we got to the table.)
He replied, "I'm sorry. My manager said I have to cut you off."
We, of course, thought he was joking. We're 5 of the most straight-laced women you have ever met, so of course we laughed. I mean, I'm 42 years old, and I was there with my mom, for crying out loud!
He didn't laugh with us, but simply handed us our bill.
Apparently, there was a complaint about us being too loud.
I tell you what, that will put a damper on a fun evening real quick.
For about 5 seconds.
We paid our bill and walked on out.
Then laughed even harder and louder.
For hours.
In all my years of eating out, through the rowdiness of college and the disaster of toddler temper tantrums, I have never been asked to leave a restaurant.
I guess there really is a first time for everything!
If you are so inclined, head on over to Jen's to read the lists of other, more law-abiding, respectable ladies.
Have a lovely day!
(Quick Takes are hosted by Jennifer Fulwiler. She is becoming quite famous in Catholic circles, on national radio and everything to talk about her new book, Something Other than God, in which she tells of her conversion from atheism.)
******* First First ******
I have been taking the productive route this week, which included several days of mowing while the little boys had their quiet (there-is-no-way-we-are-going-to-nap-no-matter-how-tired-we-are) time. While mowing I came across a dead raccoon, which I estimate to be somewhere between 30 and 150 pounds. For the first time ever, (because yes, I come across dead animals in the yard all the time) I chose to not move it. I actually mowed around the nasty, smelly thing. I just wasn't in the mood for dealing with that mess. To dust that raccoon shall return, right where it was dropped off by the dogs.
(I'm going to save you from vomiting in your mouth and not show you a photo of the decaying coon.)
******** Second First **********
Buttercup has finally become part of the gainfully employed by refereeing a soccer game this week. It was cold and rainy, and she was completely miserable. But she earned $12 for that one hour of miserable. Totally worth it. This is a skill she will be able to use to make some great money throughout high school and college and into adulthood if she wants. When she refs a tournament weekend, she can come home with almost $200 in her pocket.
 |
| This was supposed to be a photo off Buttercup in her ref outfit on the field. As my camera was focusing, this goober parked illegally in order to watch the game from his car. Buttercup is right on the other side of him. |
************ Third First ***********
We play a lot of games at our house, and I am the kind of parent who doesn't let my children win. They have to earn that title of champion Boggle player, and are happy to do it. Lately, Cuckoo has been wanting to play checkers. While he does know how to play, I easily beat him while guiding him to look at moves differently. On Thursday, I wasn't paying the closest of attention. Like the hare, I was overly confident and didn't give Cuckoo enough credit. (In my defense, he is only 4 and a half.) And like that pesky Tortoise who slowly and steadily beat the hare, he cleverly and methodically took me out. Fair and square.
*********** Fourth First *************
Our family is not known for our singing ability. When the kids try out for the school musical, they get put in roles that have absolutely no singing involved. The music teacher actually lets them down nicely by saying, "This song just isn't right for your voice." Bryan has no idea how to keep a beat, let alone stay on tune. I sound fantastic in my own head while I am belting out a good 80s song, but no one else seems to agree. The lack of ability in the children is expected. And then this week, Giant shocked us all. He was actually chosen to be a cantor at the school Mass. Sitting in the back of church, I heard him belt out his verse of the Responsorial psalm. He hit the notes. On time. And it was good. Shocking, I tell you!
************* Fifth First **********
After last year was dubbed Year of the Broken Bones, we have been doing great about staying injury-free since the new year began. Unfortunately, that changed this week. While goofing of with his brothers before Buttercup's soccer game on Sunday afternoon, Turken hurt himself. It wasn't until Monday morning, when he started walking crookedly and not using his left arm and complaining that his shoulder hurt and had a big lump of swelling show up on his collar, that we thought to get him checked out. Aaaaand, he has a broken collar bone. While it is not the first time we put off taking a kid with a broken bone to the doctor, it is the first time we did it with this particular child. And with that, Turken is inducted into the Coop of Broken Bone Doom.
 |
| Full of pain-killing ibuprofen. This is his tough face. |
****************** Sixth First **************
Star is known as the "cup mostly empty" guy in our family. He just has a knack for sniffing out the bad in a situation, regardless of how good the rest of the situation is. Star has a giant jerk as a soccer coach, and his full jerkness came out swinging against Star during their tournament this weekend. I was beyond livid the entire two days. However, I knew that if I said anything, it would only get worse. (As Clark would be quick to point out...) Biting my tongue is not an easy thing for me to do, so I got very little sleep. Dreaming up all of the ways I would love to tell this guy off kept me up much of the night. As we were heading home on Sunday, Star shocked me. For the first time ever, that child had a better attitude than me. Not only was he not livid, he wasn't the least bit mad. While I was ready to head to the soccer fields on Monday, demanding Star be moved to a different team, he was calm and rational, telling me to wait and see how things progressed during the season. While I shouted, "Shut up and get mad like me!" in my head, I agreed to do things the way he wanted.
He proved to be right. There was another game on Wednesday. Star shined, making one of the best blocks I have ever seen. (He's a goalkeeper.) The kids on his team, the other team's coach, and his own coach showered him with high fives and "great jobs". Star managed to show the jerk that the jerk had made a mistake, and he did it in his own way.
*********** Seventh First ***********
Four ladies and a Canadian walk into an Olive Garden...
The four ladies would be three other soccer moms and me. The Canadian would be my mom, who joined Star and me at the tournament. The players and the dads went to a pro soccer game Saturday night, so the ladies went out for dinner and a drink.
During the meal, we told lots of funny stories and laughed our heads off.
It was prom night, so lots of couples were in the restaurant in all their prom finery. As the girls finished their meals and headed for the door, we asked them to stop at our table and show off their dresses, shoes, and flowers. The girls were thrilled, showing off and telling us all about their dresses, their dates, and their accessories.
At one point after we were done eating, we asked our waiter to get us a second round of drinks. (There was a bit of a wait before we were seated, so we each grabbed a first cocktail from the bar before we got to the table.)
He replied, "I'm sorry. My manager said I have to cut you off."
We, of course, thought he was joking. We're 5 of the most straight-laced women you have ever met, so of course we laughed. I mean, I'm 42 years old, and I was there with my mom, for crying out loud!
He didn't laugh with us, but simply handed us our bill.
Apparently, there was a complaint about us being too loud.
I tell you what, that will put a damper on a fun evening real quick.
For about 5 seconds.
We paid our bill and walked on out.
Then laughed even harder and louder.
For hours.
In all my years of eating out, through the rowdiness of college and the disaster of toddler temper tantrums, I have never been asked to leave a restaurant.
I guess there really is a first time for everything!
If you are so inclined, head on over to Jen's to read the lists of other, more law-abiding, respectable ladies.
Have a lovely day!
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