Monday Listicles: It's a Celebration!

A number is completely relative.  If simply given the number 100, a person cannot say with confidence, "It is a large number."

If you're talking about the number of dollars you have in the bank, an adult may cry from the smallness of it.

If you're talking about degrees, a child may cry from the It's So Stinkin' Hotness of it.

100 cookies would be considered excessive.

100 Legos wouldn't be enough to make a good house, let alone a good castle.

100 words in a post would be unheard of/impossible for most of us.

100 Listicles would seem unreachable.

BUT...

Stasha has done it!  Today is the 100th Monday Listicle!  In celebration, our topic is "Why Listicles are Great (or anything else you fancy)".

Well, I only have three reasons for why Listicles are great:

1.  Funny, funny people link up each week, and it's always good to start a week with some belly laughing.
2.  The topics are great jumping-off points to test my own creativity.
3.  The writing of my Listicle and the reading of other Listicles are great excuses for procrastinating and avoiding my chores.

I am a great procrastinator.  I have no trouble coming up with something to do besides what I should be doing.  So, I'm going to take Door #2 and make a list of "anything else I fancy" while I put off cleaning and getting graduation decorations ready. 

10 Ways to Get Out of Doing Yard Work, Even When Your Yard Looks Like an Abandoned Property and Your House Looks Like It Was Taken Over By Homeless Squatters.
(aka What We Did This Weekend)

1.  Avoid the mower for a whole week, so when the grass/weeds are really long and it's time to mow, the mower's battery will be dead.  It takes an entire day to charge, and there isn't a darn thing you can do about it.

2.  Attend every single party to which you were invited (including the 8th grade picnic on the last day of school) even if it means you will talk to the same exact people at every single one.

And you'll get to take boring photos of kids signing each other's shirts, but unexpectedly get a shot of a basketball which looks like it's going to have a direct hit with your oldest's head.

3.  Have a yummy dessert disguised as breakfast at a restaurant, because, Hey! I have a 10% off coupon!

Chocolate Cheesecake Pancakes with a side of butter.  I talked him out of the Oreo Cheesecake pancakes with the logic that the Oreos would be too unhealthy.

3.  Hold a butterfly at the zoo's butterfly exhibit.

5.  Or not.

6.  Take a nice, long walk along the canal, because the big honkin' van you drive doesn't fit in any of the downtown parking garages.

7.  Visit with baby ducklings.

8.  Make fun of the city which thought it necessary to engrave "NO SWIMMING" in the canal ledge. At least until you remember there is such a thing as a "bike bar" in which people pedal a four-person bike while sitting at a stocked bar.  No doubt, some drunkard has taken a dip in that nasty water. 

I wish I could show you a photo of the bike bar, but sadly, we didn't see it on Saturday, and we haven't done it yet.  Have patience.  The day will come.

9.  Go to a parade, and not just because you feel guilty about never taking your youngest children to a hometown parade..

He waved to everyone/thing that passed by and stood up for every single flag.  Even the checkered "Indy500" flags.

10.  Simultaneously pity and laugh at filthy rich people who have technical difficulties when they believe They: Indy500 Parade :: Santa: Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.*

The parade came to a screeching halt for about five minutes because of this fiasco.  The owners of the actual Speedway track where the 500 is raced brought up the rear of the parade in three classic cars.  The first car broke down right in front of us.  The heads of the family were moved to another car, and the lower-ranked persons were forced to hoof it for the rest of the parade.  One went off into the crowd in a bit of a snit, while two actually ran behind the cars, dressed in their dress clothes and shoes.  I would have felt bad if it weren't so darn funny to watch.

  Now, go congratulate Stasha and see what others have to say!

*After that example of my analogy-writing capabilities, you probably think I rocked the analogy questions of standardized tests.  You would be wrong.

** Why yes, we do have six children.  Phoenix and Star aren't in the photos because they left the house at 7:00am to work at the parade with other Boy Scouts.

Have a lovely day!